RESTAURANT REVIEW : Studio City Delicatessens Serve Good, Bad and Bland

Agoraphobics need not read the following review.

Those afflicted with a fear of the marketplace certainly will have no desire to set foot in either of the thronging, bustling, clamorous, unpretentious Studio City gathering spots herein examined. At Art’s Delicatessen and Jerry’s Famous Delicatessen, there’s always a crowd, often a wait and sometimes a crush.

Art’s is a basic delicatessen, as no-nonsense as an automat, as unromantic as a cafeteria. It’s a place to go with good friends when you just need an easy place to all be together or a place to go alone when exhausted or writing sad, urban poetry or a difficult letter of apology: In the harshly lit, crowded dining room, one is automatically assimilated into the human race.

In general, delicatessen (the food) has evolved far from its original root-word meanings of dainty and delicacy, and this evolution is nowhere more apparent than in Art’s signature handiwork. The house motto is “every sandwich is a work of Art,” and in case one needs an illustration, the walls are adorned with huge photographs of the massive sandwiches. These blowups are stratigraphic studies of stacked meat between curling bread, which, above all else, make it apparent how difficult it must be to photograph food in an appetizing fashion. The pastrami and corned beef sandwiches, in the flesh as it were, are indeed huge constructions of iridescent pink meats and basic rye bread; they’re juicy and just delicious. Despite the fact that they’re too thick for any human mouth, at table after table, they’re successfully devoured.

Our waitress is older, motherly, thorough and weary-looking. To be fair, the fluorescent lights and the yellow-ocher, schmaltz-colored walls make everyone look equally pallid and worn out, as if we all need a good dose of chicken soup.

In fact, we have an argument about who gets to order the chicken in a pot, that classic deli three-chicken-soups-in-one: chicken noodle, kreplach and matzo ball. The noodles and kreplach are fine, but the slow-pitch matzo ball is leaden and tasteless, and the broth and big hunks of essentially boiled chicken are nowhere near as heart-warming as we had hoped. A thick, tasty mushroom-barley soup is more satisfying. My cabbage rolls turn out to be the hit of the evening: Stuffed with rice and ground beef and in a chunky tomatoey sweet-and-sour sauce, they are tasty and surprisingly light. Side dishes aren’t so impressive: The cheese blintzes are the shape of egg rolls, and almost as fried. The potato pancakes are bland and, although fried to crispiness, are mushy inside. The knishes are gummy.

But to anyone enduring a sad streak, I highly recommend Art’s creamy, comforting stove-top rice pudding with raisins.

Recommended dishes: stuffed cabbage plate, $9.25; corned beef-pastrami sandwich, $7.40; rice pudding, $2.95.

Down the street from Art’s at Jerry’s Famous Deli, we have to wait for a table, so we range about in front of the lushly stocked display cases and eavesdrop on our fellow customers’ conversations. Everyone, it seems, is talking about money: mutual funds, real estate, life insurance, banking practices. Clearly, the topic is inspired by the environment, for Jerry’s is a gold mine.

Jerry’s has a newer, more prosperous air than Art’s, and is often, but not always, a little more expensive. There are posters paving the wall, house plants, private alcoves, an enclosed terrace and dark wood furniture. Essentially, it’s a ‘70s coffee shop--a thronging coffee shop with a noticeably above-average noise level. I don’t know if it’s the kinder lighting or the truth, but the crowd seems, in general, upwardly mobile, professional and robust.

The waiters and waitresses, in their red aprons, are young and energetic. Rumor has it that comedian Andy Kaufman , when he was starting out in show business, was directed by his psychiatrist to work at a real job among real people; thus, he became a busboy at Jerry’s. Our clever, cheerful waitress confirms this rumor. “But why, exactly, is it called Jerry’s Famous Deli?” we ask her.

“Because everyone who works here hopes to be famous some day,” she says.

Meals start with a dish of wonderful half-dill Kosher pickles and green tomatoes. And although we found the potato pancakes and knishes as disappointing here as at Art’s, Jerry’s chicken in a pot is a far cry better: The matzo ball is cloud-like, the broth rich and nourishing, the chicken itself juicy and plump. The blintzes were the proper shape, fried only enough to heat them through, and deliciously fresh-tasting. Jerry’s cabbage rolls, however, were dull and heavy, and they swam in a canned-tasting tomato puree.

Sandwiches here are definitely not only not a work of art, they’re not particularly good either. They may be thicker than the sandwiches at Art’s, and they may cost a dollar more, but frankly, the meat is dry, nowhere near as tasty, and slabs of Swiss cheese and shredded lettuce don’t help. Hands down, Art’s makes a better sandwich.

We ask the waitress which of the tempting cakes, tortes and desserts in the revolving glass case are made on the premises. “Bread and rice pudding,” she says. “Oh, and the Jell-O, too.” The bread pudding we find dry, the rice pudding in the words of one dining companion, “glutinous.” We vow that next time, we’ll try the cheesecake, which is said to be shipped all the way from New York.

For those cocooners who, late at night after four movies on the VCR, suddenly wonder if there’s still a sea of humanity out there in the real world, the answer is yes: Jerry’s is open 24 hours a day, seven days a week and is always jumping.

Serious sandwich eaters can’t be so nocturnal; Art’s closes at 8:30 nightly.

Recommended dishes at Jerry’s: cheese blintzes, $6.50; boiled chicken in a pot, $9.95.

Art’s, 12224 Ventura Boulevard, Studio City. (818) 796-9808. Open daily from 7:30 a.m. to 8:30 p.m. No reservations. MasterCard and Visa accepted. Wine and beer.

Jerry’s Famous Deli, 12655 Ventura Boulevard, Studio City. (818) 980-4245. Open 24 hours daily. Reservations for large parties only. Visa, MasterCard and American Express accepted. Full bar.