Hate to Eat Alone? Try Shared Tables

Sure, there are a million stories in the naked city. But who are you going to share them with? If you have a quick coffee on your way to work, a solo sandwich at the deli for lunch, and a McDinner in your car while heading for the gym, you can spend the whole day without chatting up a soul until you get home to your spouse or the cat.

Or, to quote Maggie Adams of Los Angeles: “Sometimes it’s better talking to a geek while you eat than talking to no one at all.”

Adams ought to know. She almost always ate by herself when she traveled the country as a parts representative for the Chrysler Corp. Meals were usually awkward, sometimes downright dispiriting: “It’s hard to pretend you like staring at the wallpaper while you sip and chew all alone,” she says.

That’s why Adams, 31, now a manager at Monty’s steak house in Westwood, bought Jody Soburn’s idea, called Shared Seating.

It’s not new, revolutionary or upscale. In fact, it’s little more than a cozy concept that offers diners potluck in terms of people.

The idea is to share a table with someone you don’t know, Soburn says. “You enter a restaurant alone, and the host or hostess gives you a choice: You can sit by yourself or you can sit with someone. It’s just that simple.”

Soburn says she first experienced shared seating on a Club Med vacation, and then on trips to Europe. “And once in downtown L.A. I shared a table. I started talking, they started talking and I had a great time.”

But until now, most Los Angeles restaurants rejected the idea, she says. They thought the public wouldn’t want it. “I tried this in ’87 and again in ‘89,” she explains, “but they were closed to it. They had no idea what they were missing.”

Now Soburn has sold her plan to the Sports Deli in Century City, the British Raaj in Santa Monica, and about five other restaurants in L.A. in addition to Monty’s. Most of them have offered the plan for about a month. Soburn, who keeps track of results by watching the action and talking with owners, says different types of people seem to like it.

David Scheinfarb, for example. He’s a 28-year-old real estate broker at Fred Sands in Santa Monica who considered his options one recent noontime and says he found them “limited. I needed lunch. I also need to sell real estate. I saw a leaflet about Shared Seating in my office, and I asked myself, ‘Why not?’ Maybe I could make some contacts.’ I certainly can’t meet clients sitting at my desk.”

Scheinfarb says there were two men already at the Shared Seating table when he got to Monty’s--and instead of talking real estate, they talked about what a good idea it is to sit together instead of alone. He gave both men his business cards and says he’ll return. And he wishes more eateries would latch on to the idea.

Businesswoman A. Taylor Burton says she was doing errands in Santa Monica one day and got a craving for curry. She went into British Raaj for a quick lunch and found it was full. “The owner asked if I’d like to share a table, and I thought that was wonderful. I’ve often wondered why restaurants don’t automatically offer people that option. A few times, I’ve even thought of asking the maitre d’--but it would be considered rude. Maybe if Soburn sells this to enough places, it will become socially sanctioned to share.”

Soburn doesn’t expect to make a killing--or even a living--from Shared Seating. (Hypnotherapy is her main profession). But she’s trying to sign up restaurants all over Los Angeles. For $40 she provides a sign that says “Shared Seating Is Available,” along with cards to put on the communal tables. She also distributes flyers to businesses in the neighborhood to explain the table-top togetherness plan.

Edwin Ryu, owner of the Sports Deli in Century City, thinks the concept will work--but not necessarily in his place. “Most people come here in groups, especially at lunchtime. We don’t have that many single diners, but I’m doing it anyway because I like the idea.”

That’s the kind of thinking Soburn appreciates. “This is not about making money, nor is it about lonely, unmarried people seeking a love life,” she says. “It’s about the fact that there are fantastic people out there, and we are meeting less and less of them. We are getting shy of being social. Most of us whiz around town and wind up alone at many mealtimes. We don’t like to eat out alone, so fewer of us go to restaurants. It’s easier to eat in our cars, or at home. It’s one reason many people often feel lonely even if they have jobs, spouses, friends.”

Soburn also loves the idea that it’s all about “chance encounters. You never know who you’re going to get. You sit down and your table partner may look ordinary, perhaps even dull. Then he opens up his mouth and suddenly looks good because of what he says. People are going to start seeing with their ears instead of with their eyes.”