It Seems as if His Chances Are About as Good as Pete Rose’s

No major league batter with 400 home runs has ever failed to make the Hall of Fame, but Dave Kingman, who hit 442, has a chance to make history.

There may be more reasons than the fact that Kingman was openly contemptuous of baseball writers, who do the choosing.

“He’ll never get in,” writes the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette’s Bruce Keidan. “Kingman was more of an idiot savant than a baseball player. He was an abominable fielder. He never hit for a respectable average, mostly because he couldn’t distinguish between a ball and a strike.

“He was strictly a one-trick pony. If he’s elected to the Hall of Fame, someone should give the voters a saliva test.”

Son of Bob: After Team Indiana lost in the final of the AAU junior men’s basketball tournament, its coach complained about the officiating, ordered his players not to speak with the media and pulled his three all-tournament players from the group photo.

The coach? Tim Knight, son of Indiana University Coach Bob Knight.

Hip hooray: Announcer Skip Caray, enjoying the Atlanta Braves’ turnaround, told USA Today about the bad old days.

“The darkest moment I thought . . . was two or three years ago, we were playing the Cardinals in St. Louis, an extra-inning game, and (Whitey) Herzog ran out of pitchers. He figured he was going to lose, so why not put Jose Oquendo in there?

(Oquendo retired the Braves. In the bottom of the inning, the Cardinals loaded the bases.)

“They got the bases loaded with one out. I remember saying, ‘If we lose this game, it will be the darkest day in the history of the Atlanta Braves.’

“Somehow they didn’t score, and we got the win.”

Caray also insisted to USA Today that he’s no homer.

Trivia time: What was the highest-rated televised sports event ever?

Mr. Softy: The late Paul Brown was a tough taskmaster, but he had a soft side. You might have had to hang in there, but he had one.

“He laid you bare naked in front of the whole world,” said former Cleveland quarterback Frank Ryan of Brown’s film sessions. “He’d stop the projector and put the lights on and look right through you, telling you how badly you had screwed something up. Everyone hated those sessions. . . .

“One of the most wonderful days of my life happened a few years after I stopped playing. I was in Washington then, and he was bringing the (Cincinnati) Bengals in to play the Redskins. I called him to try to meet him at the hotel.

“I got him on the phone and said, ‘This is Frank Ryan.’ He said, ‘You mean my Frank Ryan?’ That meant so much to me. It touches me to this day.”

Add Brown: Neither Bengal Coach Sam Wyche nor his players paid a condolence call or attended Brown’s funeral services. “That was one of the last things he said,” Wyche said. “In no way is training camp to be disrupted when he died. We’ll honor that request.”

Nice try: Predicting the future is never easy. Witness the Sporting News’ 1991 Baseball Yearbook’s predictions.

National League manager of the year--Don Zimmer, Cubs. Since fired.

American League manager of the year--John Wathan, Royals. Since fired.

NL comeback player of the year--Todd Worrell, Cardinals. Hasn’t come back yet.

AL Cy Young Award--Dave Stewart, A’s. Wrong season.

NL MVP--Darryl Strawberry, Dodgers. Uh, no.

For the record: A Morning Briefing reference to Denver Nugget General Manager Bernie Bickerstaff having made an obscene gesture to a fan was incorrect. The fan made the gesture.

Trivia answer: Super Bowl XVI in 1982, 49ers 26, Bengals 21. According to A.C. Nielsen, it had a 49.1 rating and a 73 share.

Quotebook: National League umpire Dana DeMuth, asked by Inland Empire magazine how many umpires wear contact lenses: “A lot.”