COMMENTARY : Season of Bad Coaching in NFL

About five times during the Monday night game, you half-expected the Orchard Park, N.Y., police to storm Rich Stadium, chase down Sam Wyche and handcuff him to the Bengals’ bench. Maybe somewhere, sometime, a coach in the NFL has been more out of control, but it’s doubtful. Wyche was so maniacal, so combative, so absolutely without discipline, he made an otherwise unwatchable game compelling. The referee should have been empowered to slap a straitjacket on him. Wyche was so ballistic, the laconic Mike Ditka was probably saying, “Will you get a load of this guy?”

If he wasn’t already, Sam Wyche as coach is doomed. His Cincinnati Bengals are 0-7 and not only has he lost control of the team, he led them there. One thing is for sure though: He has plenty of company in misery. While Wyche is the easiest target, he isn’t the only one. Jerry Burns, Dan Henning, John Robinson, Lindy Infante and Richard Williamson may not survive the season, and it’s next to impossible to stick up for any of them. This could be remembered, outside Washington, New Orleans, Buffalo and Houston, as the season of bad coaching.

Let’s start with Burns. The question isn’t when he is going to be fired. It’s why wasn’t he cut loose a couple of years ago. The Vikings have the highest payroll in the league and it isn’t totally undeserved because they have one of the most-talented teams.

Yet, they appear poised to miss the playoffs for the third time in four years. It used to seem Burnsie only looked perplexed 24 hours a day. Now we know he is perplexed. If you can’t even make the playoffs when nearly one-fourth of the players on your roster (Joey Browner, Anthony Carter, Chris Doleman, Steve Jordan, Carl Lee, Randall McDaniel, Mike Merriweather, Herschel Walker, Wade Wilson and Gary Zimmerman) have been to the Pro Bowl (and Cris Carter, Al Noga and Henry Thomas could just as well have), perhaps being a head coach isn’t for you. Easily, Burnsie beats out Buddy Ryan as the coach who did the least with the most.

Here is something Henning actually did two Sundays ago: With one second left in the first half and the ball on their 1-yard line, there were three options available to the Chargers to run out the clock. They could have John Friesz throw a deep pass, out of danger, to anyone on either team; sneak the ball ahead behind the center; or spike the ball into the ground. Instead, the play call was for straight-ahead bowling ball Marion Butts to sweep wide, out into the end zone, where he was tackled two yards deep by the Rams for a safety. For this coaches have 85 meetings a week and sleep on sofas overnight? Nixon sent better plays to George Allen.

GM Bobby Beathard, a voice of reason, wanted to give Henning another chance this year after a pair of 6-10 seasons. But at 1-7, it’s doubtful Beathard will save him again from owner Alex Spanos. By the way, who has a better backfield than Butts, Rod Bernstine and Ronnie Harmon?

The 1-6 Packers are having a hard enough time finding one ballcarrier. Tuesday’s silence from club president Bob Harlan, who declined to comment on Infante’s status, is telling. There’s a word that describes the 10-6 season the Packers had two years ago: fluke. Bad draft choices and personnel decisions have undercut Infante, but you don’t think the higher-ups are going to shoulder the blame, do you?

Things are even uglier, as usual, in Tampa Bay. The people who keep saying how bad Vinny Testaverde is are missing the point. Testaverde never had a chance. Williamson can’t be blamed for that; predecessor Ray Perkins gets most of the credit for Testaverde’s failure to improve one iota in five years. But this musical quarterbacks game Williamson has been playing is awful for both players (Testaverde and Chris Chandler) and the team, which is 1-6 with no sign of hope. If Dan Marino had been drafted by Tampa Bay and Testaverde by Miami, don’t you believe there could have been complete reversals of fortune?

It’s not nearly as easy to summarily dismiss Robinson and Wyche. Robinson didn’t go on SlimFast like some of his other chubby brethren, which is to be commended. Robinson also has proven he’s at least a competent NFL head coach, some years among the coaching elite. But the Rams shouldn’t be 3-4; they ought to be Super Bowl contenders. One bad year (5-11 last year) was excusable. But Robinson doesn’t appear to be able to right the ship. A Southern Californian through and through, Robinson would certainly know what to do with all those backs the Chargers have.

It will be excruciating for Cincinnati boss Mike Brown to call it quits with Wyche, who has been one of the league’s most innovative, engaging coaches on one hand but a total pain on the other. There was the intentional run-it-up-to-high-heaven demolition of Jerry Glanville’s Oilers a couple of years ago (my favorite football game in 11 years as a sportswriter), but then a stupid lockout of female reporters one night. He popularized the no-huddle, but has turned into just another clock manager who wants to get up by seven points then sit on the ball.

Even discounting his recent rantings, Monday night was Wyche’s low point. The Bengals had four possessions inside the Buffalo 30 in the first quarter and came away with three points, killed by truly boneheaded play-calling. Wyche insisted on using fresh-off-IR Ickey Woods, even though the Bills were clueless about stopping Harold Green, and James Brooks, the best back in franchise history, wa/ced to special-teams duty for much of the game.