Coaches Fear Losing to the Rams

U nconventional wisdom for a Friday morning . . .

The Rams: They have become the cardinal sins of the National Football League. The Giants lost to them and the cry echoed across New York and New Jersey: Bring Back Parcells! The Packers lost to them and now Lindy Infante is on the way out. The Chargers lost to them and Dan Henning is as good as gone. NFL coaches now know the score: Lose to the Rams, lose your job.

John Robinson: Him, too? No doubt, change is the only way out for the Rams, but changing the head coach won’t absolve all the guilty parties. Multiple-choice question for the day: This time next year, which way do the Rams look better? With (a) a new coach, the same owner and the same general manager, or (b) the same coach, a new owner and a new general manager. Plan B does have a ring to it.

Georgia Frontiere: The takedown of the franchise began at the top, when Georgia and John Shaw reached a mid-1980s crossroads--”We can pay them now or pay for it later”--and opted for the bottom line. Later has arrived and it looks like 5-11 followed by 3-9. Bill Parcells couldn’t coach for Georgia. Bill Walsh couldn’t coach for Georgia. Could you?

Jeff Fisher: He was hired as a potential successor to Robinson and he might be the only card Robinson has left to play: “Let me coach one more year, until Jeff’s ready.” Of course, Fisher looked a lot more ready before his first Ram defense gave up 289 points in 12 games. Only Cincinnati (1-11 and 350 points) has yielded more.

Jim Everett: Not the reason for the Rams’ disintegration, although he surely hasn’t done much to slow it. If the Rams decide to rebuild from ground zero, maybe they begin here. Everett is the only player the Rams could trade for the quantity and quality of draft choices they need--and David Klingler and Rick Mirer figure to be on the board in ’92. With Eric Dickerson, the Rams traded a star in exchange for the future and what did it get them? If they want a second chance, a chance to get it right, here it is.

Steve Bono: You’d consider it a fluke, if not for Erik Kramer . . . and Steve Walsh . . . and Tom Tupa . . . and Hugh Millen . . . and Anthony Dilweg . . . and . . .

Steve Beuerlein: Apparently he can still play. Now we’ll see who goes further in the playoffs, the quarterback or the owner who said the quarterback couldn’t quarterback.

Eric Davis: Darryl Strawberry, Brett Butler, Eric Davis--what an outfield! Eric Karros, Lenny Harris, Dave Hansen, Jose Offerman--what, an infield?

Eddie Murray: Are they free-agent signings or time-release trades--players for players to be named very much later? Strawberry to the Dodgers in late 1990. Murray to the Mets in late 1991. Next at the gate: Frank Viola?

Kal Daniels: Go see Kal DH in 1992.

Bobby Bonilla: Why doesn’t Gene Autry name him co-owner and get it over with?

Wally Joyner: St. Louis said no--too much money. The New York Mets said no--too much Murray. The doors keep closing and now the Angels don’t look like Joyner’s best option--they might be his only option. An Angels-Joyner reunion? We always said the Angels could do worse. The upset is that now, so can Joyner.

Otis Nixon: If Orange County can forgive one Nixon, why not two?

Tom Webster: A new conspiracy theory has arisen: This is really a conspiracy by Webster to get out of coaching the Kings. The expectations are high, the pressure is heavy and now the injuries are mounting. When Webster did his javelin throw at referee Kerry Fraser, he was knowingly pulling the ripcord on a month’s reprieve. After his 12-game suspension is served, Webster will have missed 34 full games in less than 2 1/2 seasons with the Kings. Rumor has it NHL Vice President Brian O’Neill considered the harshest penalty allowed--a no-game suspension; Webster would be forced to coach the rest of the season--but Webster talked him down.

Robbie Ftorek: At least he showed up for work every day.

Stanford: The Cardinal had won six in a row and then Cal is routed in the Big Game. Stanford snubbed the Freedom Bowl, but did it have to rub it in?

San Diego State: Who’s rooting harder for an upset in Miami this weekend--Bobby Bowden, Don James or Don Andersen?

Cal State Fullerton 37, Cal State Long Beach 36: Was it the last football game ever played by Long Beach? Right now, the 49er program is showing the same crisis symptoms Fullerton exhibited last year. Long Beach should have learned something by last Saturday’s game--and Fullerton, too. Real Division I-AA football, not pretend Division I-A, can be fun.

Jerry Tarkanian: At least he’s going out in style.

Seattle: The Mariners’ firing of Jim Lefebvre was the tipoff. Next, a Seattle television station attempts to bury a story about criminal allegations against several University of Washington football players because, according to the president of KIRO-TV, it would have been “a great big embarrassment to a proud institution and a great football team at a time when we should be cheering them on.” Yes, this is a city that knows how to deal with success.

Eric Dickerson: Now, after much reflection and a couple suspensions, he says he’d like to try it again in the Rams’ backfield. That wasn’t water under the bridge, Eric; that was the Johnstown flood. And that isn’t driftwood; that’s what’s left of the bridge.