IN AN AVERAGE LIFETIME . . ....

IN AN AVERAGE LIFETIME . . . by Tom Heymann (Fawcett: $8). This compendium of statistics supposedly illustrates the habits and tastes of a typical U.S. citizen. In an “average” lifetime of 74.9 years, the “average” American attends five operas and four professional hockey games; eats 801 pounds of chocolate, 8,389 hamburgers, 11,113 M&Ms; and 304 Dunkin’ Donuts; drinks 23 glasses of Champagne, 56,044 cups of coffee and 20,301 bottles of beer. The reader quickly begins comparing himself to the hypothetical standard--ahead on operas, Champagne and chocolate, behind on hamburgers, coffee, beer and hockey games. But it soon becomes obvious that these numbers are just statistical averages that don’t necessarily reflect anyone’s real behavior. By printing one fact (or pseudo-fact) per page in large type, Heymann stretches the contents of a marginally interesting magazine article into a very silly book. However, he leaves one nagging question unanswered: Who’s eating all those doughnuts?