They Should Have Slept In, but Put the Audience to Sleep

According to Alan Greenberg of the Hartford Courant, everything that could go wrong did for the Boston Celtics in Game 7 Sunday. The first problem was that the Cleveland Cavaliers showed up.

Writes Greenberg: “This was the difference between a new compact disc and a scratchy old album. Between high-definition, color TV and grainy, black-and-white newsreels. What strategy could Coach Chris Ford offer his overwhelmed team during those painful timeouts? ‘Hey, Bags (John Bagley), go out there and get about 12 light years quicker. Hey, Chief (Robert Parish), go out there and be 10 years younger. ‘

“Afterward, the Cavaliers were asked about their next step, playing the Bulls, while McHale and Bird were asked about their next step: Retirement? That’s how it is when you get old.”

Add Boston: Someone asked Ford when he knew his guys didn’t have it?

“First pass, maybe, when Chief bounced it off his foot,” Ford said. “It was early.”

Trivia time: Eric Dickerson will attempt to become the first player to rush for 1,000 yards with three different teams. Who was the first player who did it with two teams?

Who is this guy again? The Florida Marlins offered a contract last month to Mike Anderson, who they thought was a 21-year-old pitcher from Moorpark College with no professional baseball experience.

But when team officials discovered this week that Anderson was really 26 and pitched four seasons of minor league ball after being drafted in 1985 by the New York Mets, they rescinded their offer.

“We can’t check out every kid who walks into a tryout camp,” said John Boles of the Marlins. “It’s not like you’re asking them to bring their driver’s license and social security number.”

You mean no free tickets? It was when Anderson was arrested last week on charges of trying to bilk a Florida auto dealer out of a car with an allegedly bogus $5,000 check that the Marlins found out about him.

A salesman at the car dealership said Anderson even told them he could get them free tickets to the games.

Last add Anderson: Anderson was with the Port St. Lucie Mets at the end of the 1988 season when, according to Manager Clint Hurdle, Anderson told him he wanted to drive his father back from a trip. It was just before the playoffs.

“They hopped into a car and I never heard from him the rest of the season,” Hurdle said.

Trivia answer: Mike Garrett with the Kansas City Chiefs (1967) and San Diego Chargers (‘72).

Quotebook: Babe Ruth’s daughter, Julia Ruth Stevens, 74, of Conway, N.H., on the latest movie of her father’s life: “They made him out to be something I didn’t know. I know he liked to have fun, but I don’t believe he did the things they wrote in the movie.”