They always get their mannequin: The most...

They always get their mannequin: The most durable member of Long Beach’s police force sits all day in a patrol car, takes no lunch (or doughnut) breaks and never utters a complaint.

What kind of a dummy would do that job? Officer Wax Works.

“We put him in highly visible areas where there have been a lot of speeding violations,” explained Lt. Linda Fierro, a department spokeswoman.

The mustachioed mannequin was photographed the other day by resident Cathy Franklin, who observed: “Despite his alert look, he never gives a ticket.”

But, said Lt. Fierro, his presence does reduce speeding. And, Fierro added, some residents “have left notes on his windshield just thanking him for being in the area. Sometimes, people even believe he is real and approach him and talk for quite a while until they find out that he’s not real.”

Sad to say, not everyone has treated Officer Wax Works with respect.

“He did have his wig stolen one time,” Fierro said.

We’re sure he was a fan, though: One of the scoops published by the Quayle Quarterly, a newsletter that followed the career of the vice president over the last three years, was that Quayle turned down an honorary membership in the Studio City-based “Gilligan’s Island” Fan Club due to “ethical constraints.”

This disclosure pains us because the vice president’s lack of support may account for the fan club’s failure earlier this year to persuade Hawaii to change the name of Maui to Gilligan’s Island.

Dream couple: Michael Sington, who has a license plate that says MLBU KEN (Malibu Ken), writes that he’s been “told by several people that a woman has been spotted driving in the San Fernando Valley with plates that read MLBU BBE. Sington wants to meet her to find out if she’s a Malibu Barbie--and to ask: “What are you doing in the Valley?”

The Dodgers’ losing streak continues: An Encino campaign worker who was holding a Barbara Boxer banner on election night had no luck with one passerby who said he was going to vote for Hersheiser.

Hole in four: Jack Mudrick, 92, will be on the links in Los Feliz on Monday for his annual nine-hole match against three generations of Mudricks: his son Harvey, 69, his grandson Gary, 40, and his great-grandson, Adam, 9. “If I hadn’t married so late,” said Gary, “we might have had a fifth generation out there.”

This city gets kidded enough as it is: We’re passing up the TV miniseries on Frank Sinatra unless we get a guarantee that he’s not going to sing his non-hit of a few years ago, “L.A. Is My Lady.”

MiscelLAny:

The Holly Street Bar and Grill in Pasadena was formerly Turner & Stevens Mortuary.