THE CRISIS IN CHILD CARE : For One Nanny, the Day Is Long and Exhausting

Child-care providers are frequently called upon to be nursemaids, chauffeurs, educators, cooks, housekeepers and nurturers. But they are sometimes classified as “unskilled labor.”

We recently spent a day with Maria Hanhela, 23, who works as an au pair for a Costa Mesa couple with two daughters--Megan, 3, and Melissa, 11 months--to find out what it’s like to care for other people’s children.

Michael and Michelle Mulrooney have hired a series of au pairs, young women who typically work for about a year in exchange for air fare, health insurance, room and board and about $100 a week.

In addition, Michael, a businessman, and Michelle, a lawyer, pay overtime for more than 45 hours a week, hire a weekly house cleaner, cook their own dinners and provide Maria with a station wagon.

The Mulrooneys have hired their nannies legally through an authorized cultural exchange and child-care program, the Laguna Beach-based EurAupair.

8 a.m. Maria wipes the table and finishes the breakfast dishes. Melissa, who took her first step the previous week--with Maria as her only witness--cheerfully practices her walking. Megan, who has a cold, clings to her mother’s black dress.

They decide Megan will go to preschool today even though she’s been sick, because the school is celebrating Valentine’s Day and it is Megan’s turn to be “Super Star” and bring treats for her schoolmates.

8:15 a.m. The parents wave goodby, and Maria starts her formal work day. The baby wails, and Maria takes her into her room to play with toys. A minute later, Melissa is laughing again.

8:25 a.m. Michelle calls from her car phone to remind Maria to give the baby her vitamins. Maria then gives the baby a bath and new diaper. While Maria dresses the baby, Megan jumps on her back. “Who is on my back?” Maria says, laughing. “It’s Megan!”

8:45 a.m. Maria carries the baby and a sack full of Megan’s treats to the car. Megan follows. Maria buckles both children in, the first of 10 bucklings and unbucklings of the day. Their noses are running.

8:55 a.m. Maria and her charges arrive at preschool. Megan dashes across the street. “Watch the cars,” Maria calls. Maria signs Megan in and discusses her day with the preschool teacher.

9:25 a.m. Back home, the baby is asleep in her car seat. “Hi, Lissy-boo,” Maria says, lifting her out with a kiss. She puts the baby down to sleep, then does laundry and writes letters in the den with a baby monitor nearby. When Melissa wakes up after an hour, they read books and play until it is time to pick up Megan for lunch.

Noon. Maria signs Megan out. She asks, “Do you have a stomach ache? No? Good! Then we can go to Taco Bell.”

12:15 p.m. Maria dashes across the Taco Bell parking lot. “I want you to hold my hand, Meggy,” says Maria, carrying the baby on her hip. Juggling the baby, the tray of burritos and the drinks, Maria finds a table. She gets a high chair for the baby and asks Megan to get her own booster chair.

While Maria feeds the baby, Megan takes off her shoes and her tights. “Put your shoes on; it’s cold,” Maria urges.

“No!” Megan replies.

“Megan. Now,” Maria says.

“Will you get my shoes please?” Megan asks.

“That’s a nice way to ask, Meggy,” Maria says.

Megan starts to sing a song from her favorite video. Maria finishes it. They sing more songs, play games and then leave. Maria decides to go home instead of to the park because the girls have been ill.

1:45 p.m. Maria plays ball with the baby in the den while Megan naps. After 45 minutes, Megan’s voice floats in from the hall.

“Maria? I throwed up.” Maria investigates but finds nothing.

“Do you want some water?” Maria asks. “It’s important that you drink. Do you want to call your mommy?” Megan calls her mother, then orders Maria to get her a videotape. “Get it right now!”

“How do you ask?”

“Please.”

“Please what?”

“Please get me the video.”

3 p.m. Maria puts a wailing and screaming Melissa down for a nap. She closes the bedroom door, empties the diaper pail and picks up toys. Half an hour later, Megan also goes to sleep, giving Maria her first break of the day.

4:40 p.m. The baby wakes up. Maria feeds the baby a fresh pear, following Michelle’s instructions to include a fruit or vegetable in the children’s diet every day.

They play imitation and hiding games in the den until Megan runs in and burrows into Maria’s lap. Maria feels her brow. “You’re so hot!” They negotiate over what to eat and what to do while the baby crawls around. Maria gives Megan a dose of aspirin.

5:36 p.m. “When’s Dad going to be home?” Megan asks, the first of half a dozen queries. They pretend that Megan is a sick dog until twilight turns to night and the lights must be turned on.

6 p.m. Maria has been working for 10 hours. The baby, hungry for dinner, is building a cry into a scream. Megan and Maria negotiate repeatedly over whether she should watch another video.

6:15 p.m. A car pulls in. Megan races out and into Michael’s lap before the motor is off.

“How’s my girl?” he says, looking tired. He walks into the kitchen and opens the freezer to decide what to fix for dinner.

Having passed the baton, Maria slumps in a kitchen chair and watches Michael take over. “I bet you’re exhausted,” he tells her.

She replies, “I am.”

Watching the Kids When Mom works, how often is some form of child care used? And who provides the care? Children younger than 3 None: 32% Family day care: 22% Relative: 21% Child--care center: 20% In Home: 3% Other: 2% Child ages 3 to 4 Child--care center: 43% None: 21% Relative: 18% Family day care: 17% In--Home: 2% Other: 1% Child ages 5 to 12 None: 44% Relative: 25% Child--care center: 14% Family day care: 7% Other: 7% In--Home: 3% Source: National Child Care Survey, 1990