Why Didn’t They Do This When Clippers Were There?

Certain forms of ticket scalping, apparently, are not illegal in Houston.

The first 100 fans who agree to have their heads shaved by celebrity barber George Foreman before Thursday night’s game at the Summit between the Houston Rockets and Phoenix Suns, featuring bald Sun superstar Charles Barkley, will be given two tickets to the game.

If they’re women, they will be given two tickets to every game for the rest of the season.

Barkley has agreed to have his picture taken with all participants.

Trivia time: Who was the first black player to compete in the NBA All-Star game?

Forgettable quote: In Sunday’s editions, John Hillyer of the San Francisco Examiner wrote of Benoit Benjamin, then of the Seattle SuperSonics: “The 7-footer has sat out 19 games, only eight because of injury, although he’s pulling down $3,175,000, by far the fattest salary on the team and one that renders him virtually untradeable.”

Back in your face: After Chris Lawson of Vanderbilt, a transfer from Indiana, blocked a shot by Jamal Mashburn of Kentucky, he told Mashburn: “Don’t bring that in here again.”

Said an amused Mashburn after the game: “I guess he was excited about his first SEC block.”

Roll another one: Charlie Hough, 45-year-old pitcher for the Florida Marlins, smoked a cigarette during physical exams last week and claimed the doctor said he was in decent shape--”if I was 50.”

He’s safe--and still alive! Wrote Alan Greenberg of the Hartford Courant, who is of the opinion that major leaguers aren’t in the best of shape: “A baseball player’s idea of a successful triathlon is being able to run to third base without paramedics.”

Don’t mess with these guys: Chris Mortensen of the Sporting News reports that, because UCLA football Coach Terry Donahue was uncooperative with pro scouts last fall, he was unable to get an uninvited Bruin a spot in the recent scouting combine in Indianapolis.

Student-athletes only: Georgetown Coach John Thompson, on the kind of player he wants: “I don’t have time for jackasses any more. I don’t want to be in a situation with a kid where I have to explain the value of going to college. I don’t want somebody who wants to cut up and not take advantage of the opportunity that they have. I want kids with aggressive aspirations.”

The Mighty (Door) Mats: C.W. Nevius of the San Francisco Chronicle referred to the Southland’s newest NCAA Division I basketball team as “the Cal State Northridge Fightin’ Pushovers.”

How about Anaheim? Said NBA Commissioner David Stern, after plans to build a new arena in Boston were suspended: “As a building of the future, the Boston Garden is becoming unacceptable by NBA standards. If something isn’t done, we’re going to be forced to start thinking the unthinkable. If the city of Boston can’t provide the Celtics with a first-class facility, then we’re going to have to think about where the Celtics should be located--or relocated.”

Trivia answer: Don Barksdale, a former UCLA All-American who played in the third NBA All-Star game, on Jan. 13, 1953. At the time, Barksdale was one of only five blacks in the league.

Quotebook: Boxing promoter Don King, on his relationship with Julio Cesar Chavez: “We have a marriage, like a father and son.”