NBA Didn’t Have That Much to Pound Its Chest About

John Feinstein in Inside Sports: “Years from now when historians look back at the 1990s, they will be remiss if they do not pause and pay tribute to the marketing job done by the NBA. Never has so little been made into so much.

“Consider the playoffs last season. There was no Magic, no Bird, no Michael. Shaquille O’Neal lasted three games, David (the Admiral) Robinson four.

“Sir Charles Barkley was gone after two rounds. How many of you get excited watching John Starks go two for 11, then pound his chest when he happens to make one?”

Trivia time: Who holds the Raider record for most yards rushing in a season?

Eastern expert: George Vecsey in the New York Times: “The delightful irony is that Green Bay (population: 100,459) could wind up having one more football team than Los Angeles (population: 3,489,779). “The Raiders may be headed back where they psychically belong, to Oakland, and the Rams, who should never have left the Coliseum for the uninteresting sprawl of Orange County, may be headed eastward.”

Considerate: According to Mark Kram’s article on Arizona Cardinal Coach Buddy Ryan in Esquire, a charity “roaster” in Philadelphia said of the former Eagle coach:

“I was in the hospital and given six months to live. Buddy sent me an Eagles calendar. And he took the time out to remove the months I didn’t need.”

Hoopla: Purdue football Coach Jim Colletto assessing his team after it had beaten Minnesota, 49-37, on Oct. 8: “We didn’t shoot free throws very well.”

Right on: Rachel Shuster in USA Today: “If Michael Jordan returned to the NBA at his $3-million salary, how could those untested multimillion-dollar rookies look him in the eye?

Bottom line: Cincinnati Bengal Coach Dave Shula: “Right now, at 0-5, everybody who is a part of this organization has the same report card. It’s an F. It stinks.”

Tough standard: Mike Lupica in the Sporting News: “This is nine seasons now for (Lou) Holtz at Notre Dame. He has won one national championship. That is as many as Dan Devine won, one more than (Gerry) Faust.

“Maybe one is all Holtz has in him. Sometimes you wonder how much time Holtz has left at Notre Dame.”

Add Holtz: On why he calls plays instead of his quarterbacks:

“We have had a lot of success with a dumb person calling plays. I am hesitant to have a smart one calling them.”

Reality: ESPN’s Beano Cook: “Coaches say there’s a lot of pressure. They make $400,000, $500,000 a year. If they don’t want pressure, work at Wendy’s.”

Trivia answer: Marcus Allen, with 1,759 yards in 1985.

Quotebook: After David Letterman had said that Howard Cosell is really a smart and decent man, guest Al Michaels said: “He is a smart man.”