Midwest Didn’t Impress Rams in Those Days

The planned departure of the Rams to St. Louis recalls a meeting in 1967 between Ram owner Dan Reeves and an agent for UCLA quarterback Gary Beban, a Heisman Trophy winner and the team’s second-round draft choice.

The agent detailed a long list of demands and then told Reeves, “That’s it. You know how to reach me. I’m in the Chicago phone book.”

“Congratulations,” Reeves replied dryly.

Add Rams: Tom Weir in USA Today on the Rams’ move: “As for football purists, there’s not a lot of Rams’ history to get misty about.”

Hey, Tom, have you ever heard of Bob Waterfield, Norm Van Brocklin, Elroy Hirsch, Tom Fears, Deacon Dan Towler, Tank Younger, Dick (Night Train) Lane, Les Richter or Jon Arnett? Or were they before your time?

Trivia time: When did the Chargers last win a professional football championship?

Fashion statement: In the Wimp Sanderson days, fans at Alabama basketball games used to wear plaid sport coats to honor the coach.

Now Arizona State’s fans are following suit: In honor of Coach Bill Frieder, they’re wearing rumpled blue Oxford-cloth shirts with tacky ties askew.

Say what?Allen Bristow, Charlotte Hornet coach, on Larry Johnson: “Larry is like Joe Namath for us. He’s the straw that stirs the drink.”

Close, Coach. The original stirrer was Reggie Jackson of the New York Yankees.

Forgotten sport: Blackie Sherrod in the Dallas Morning News: “Sudden thought: Whatever happened to that enthusiastic USA soccer boom the World Cup was supposed to sow on these shores?”

Shrinking: Question to the Good Doctor in Inside Sports magazine: How is Hulk Hogan looking now that he has quit using steroids?

Answer: The Hulkster now weighs 98 pounds and is modeling underwear for Calvin Klein.

Middle man: Chicago Bull Coach Phil Jackson on his involvement in the feud between Scottie Pippen and General Manager Jerry Krause:

“I’m going around with a fire extinguisher and there’s a forest fire.”

Word games: Shawn Burr of the Detroit Red Wings is glad to get away from the NHL lockout dialogue.

“I heard a lot of new words--like transitional issues and capitulate, “ he said. “I had to look up capitulate. I thought we had done something sexual to them.”

Murdering media: The injury-plagued Detroit Pistons are struggling and media criticism persists, prompting Coach Don Chaney to lash out.

“You guys are killing us,” he told Detroit writers. “These guys are doing the best we can do, and you guys are absolutely murdering us.”

Looking back: On this day in 1985, Joe Montana passed for a Super Bowl record 331 yards in leading the San Francisco 49ers to a 38-16 victory over the Miami Dolphins.

Trivia answer: On Jan. 5, 1964, the Chargers defeated the Boston Patriots in the American Football League’s championship game, 51-10.

Quotebook: Ken Stabler, former Oakland Raider quarterback: “We were the only team in pro football whose team picture showed both a front and side view.”