Here’s one L.A. disaster you haven’t even...

Here’s one L.A. disaster you haven’t even considered:

Artist Masami Teraoka’s “Losing Contact at Silver Lake,” currently on display at the Long Beach Museum of Art, is described as “a fantasy of a colossal flood at the L.A. Zoo.”

We should add that Teraoka’s watercolor work, rather than prophecy, is “a tongue-in-cheek reference to L.A.’s infamous natural disasters.”

PUN OF THE DAY: A City News Service bulletin on Rob Pilatus, who is charged with attacking and threatening Hollywood residents on two occasions, described him as a former member of the “lip-sinking” Milli Vanilli duo.

Well, the description is appropriate. Lip-syncing did sink them.

DECLINING STANDARDS (CONT.): Robert Rabe passed along a hotel’s classified ad for an “International Transaction Attorney,” which included among the requirements, “Fluency in one or more languages preferred.” Adds Rabe: “I guess the Domestic Transaction Attorney wouldn’t have to be fluent in any language.”

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY: Scott Dewees of West Hollywood spotted a rueful message that applies to a certain percentage of the blonds in society. Didn’t they used to have more fun?

IS THE PROMOTER DON KING TUT? In the days when boxing was banned, prizefights were held in barrooms, on private estates and on beaches (so everyone could make a quick getaway by sea if police raided).

More recently came the yuppification of boxing, which has seen the sport served up in the ballrooms of such hotels as the Irvine Marriott and the Long Beach Hyatt Regency.

College campuses, such as UC Irvine’s Bren Center, have hosted fights.

And for a while, matches were even staged inside the dome that held the Spruce Goose (the boxing ring was under one of the giant wooden plane’s wings).

But we believe the location of this Tuesday’s card in Long Beach is a first for the sport. The pugs will be punching it out inside a pyramid. That is the structure housing Cal State Long Beach’s athletic arena.

The Pyramid makes sense, though. After all, inept opponents in boxing are known as “stiffs.”

PRESS RELEASES WE NEVER FINISH: “The photo shows one of the funniest yet useful novelty items to come along in years. The Pocket Panty is exactly what the name implies: a pair of colorful women’s panties, meant for wear in the breast pocket of a suit or sport coat in place of a pocket square. . . .”

ONE LESS BARGAINING TOOL: Val Rodriguez of Signal Hill saw a sign in a pawnshop that said: “No Loaded Firearms.”

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Lynn Boyle, general manager of a KFC outlet in Ridgecrest, 100 miles north of L.A., says the chicken emporium does its best business after earthquakes “but we don’t know why.” After quakes, we dab at our forehead with our Pocket Panty.