Only Madness on Manchester

Maybe they ate a mad cow. Something has to explain it. Something has gotten into these new “Bad Boy” Lakers, but what? Were they bitten by a monkey? Stung by killer bees? Did something get into the City of Inglewood water supply?

Magic Johnson bumped an official Sunday, making his official entry in the NBA’s Abuse a Referee sweepstakes. Look for this to become an event at next year’s All-Star weekend, with superstars from around the league ramming into officials and being judged on style, form and distance.

Sheltered by a Forum tunnel, trying to enjoy the second half of a 118-114 victory over the Phoenix Suns by what remained of his team, Jerry West, the executive vice president of what is becoming the Great Western Loony Bin, shook his head and said: “Something got into the water. That’s good. Write that.”

The Lakers won their 50th game. Write about that, West wanted to say. Del Harris hit the big Five-O for the first time in his coaching life. Write about that, Magic wanted to say. Anthony Peeler and Sedale Threatt played so beautifully, the Lakers barely even missed Johnson or Nick Van Exel, the Laker coach wanted to say. No, scream.

Instead, there they sat again making explanations, excuses and apologies, because another Laker captain had suddenly abandoned ship. Mere weeks after Cedric Ceballos’ vanishing act, five days after Van Exel’s illegal crackback block, came Johnson’s nudge of second-year official Scott Foster, proving once and for all that Dennis Rodman isn’t so much abnormal as ahead of his time.

Some bad-boy bug has gotten into the Lakers, long the class act of basketball. Poor Harris, he practically pleads with the press not to overlook his team’s good deeds while reporting its misdeeds. But that isn’t easy. The way his players are behaving, it’s enough to make Harris’ hair turn black.

“You know how it is, those of you who have children,” Harris said, referring to his increasingly dysfunctional team.

Just when you thought it was safe to go back into the Forum, along came Sunday’s game. Before it even began, unlucky Joe Kleine of the Suns collapsed during the national anthem. Kleine is reportedly all right, and no action is expected from the NBA about suspending him for not standing during the anthem. (Just a joke, Joe.)

Then, during the second quarter, Johnson drew a technical foul for his reaction to a Foster call. Like most NBA players, Johnson makes a face whenever anything is called against him, but he is also the last player one would expect to physically mistreat an official.

It was not deliberate. But these are sensitive times for officials, from one who got punched during a Beverly Hills high school football game to the ones who got the butt-and-bump from Rodman and Van Exel. And nobody is more painfully aware of this than Johnson, who said: “I know better. I’ve been in this league too long to do something like this.”

Particularly, in this case, because it was Johnson who had been “harping” (his word) about Van Exel’s and Ceballos’ irresponsible behavior, about their obligations to the team. It is further humbling because Johnson has represented the NBA at every position EXCEPT referee. He said, “I’m the one trying to set an example for the young guys, and accidental bumping is a poor example.”

Too many things the Lakers do these days--exclusive of what they do with a basketball--is a poor example of something.

West wears the look of a man trying to enjoy a round of golf, who can’t get out of a bunker. He said: “I don’t want to talk about these things. We would like to talk about the great season we are having. But these other things keep happening. I mean, when Earvin ‘Magic’ Johnson, the pillar of the league’s stability. . . .”

He wasn’t sure how to finish that sentence. That’s how exasperated West is.

“I’m very upset. You’d be upset too. We don’t have many controversies around here. I’ve had a lot of sleepless nights. This is a damn good team and we have a chance to do well in the playoffs, if we can ever have all our horses in the barn.”

Johnson was repentant. What he did was an accident. But it was also unsportsmanlike, and couldn’t have come at a more awkward time for the Lakers and for the league.

“I never went over there to bump him. He made a mistake. He was supposed to talk to me. I’m the captain. He gave me a ‘T’ for nothing, and then he didn’t acknowledge me. I had to go over to him to find out what happened. I stood in front of him and turned into him, accidentally. But I take full responsibility.”

“I want to apologize to the referee, as well as to the whole referee profession. It’s been a year for things like this happening. This is not the Lakers. We are not a bad-boys organization. But here I am, harping on them, and then I come out and do something like this.”

What’s gotten into the Lakers? Something has. Jerry Buss pays them to play basketball. This is how they pay him back.