Celebrating the ‘Queen’s’ Crowning Glory

The Scene: Warner Books’ coming-out party Monday for Kitty Kelley’s book “The Royals” in the cavernous wood-paneled ballroom of the National Press Club in Washington, D.C. The fete had been set to coincide with the book’s release, but Princess Diana’s death moved Warner to deliver the book early despite Kelley’s tearful objections. But with Monday night’s news that “The Royals” is now the No. 1 best-selling book in the country, there were no apologies for what Kelley protested as “ghoulish” timing.

Who Was There: More than 500 “Friends of the Queen”--the queen of the unauthorized biography, that is--including hundreds of journalists (this reporter among them), whom Kelley thanks in the preface of the book for aid and comfort during her Battle of Britain. At Kitty’s side was her “long-suffering” husband, Dr. John Zucker, the handsome dermatologist she was honeymooning with five years ago when she began working on the book, and Melissa Lakey, Kitty’s literary aide-de-camp who managed to get married and have a baby during the 4 1/2 years it took to deliver the 547-page book.

Who Was Not There: Bill and Hil. Woodward and Bernstein. Seymour Hersh--the Pulitzer Prize-winning author of the Pentagon Papers series who last week took Kelley’s place on the hot seat regarding the authenticity of documents he used to build his long-awaited JFK bio, “The Dark Side of Camelot.”

Noblest Quote: “I am here to support the 1st Amendment, of course. Isn’t that what all this is about? Isn’t that what all Kitty’s books are about?” asked Rep. Barney Frank (D-Mass.). Hundreds of signed first editions of “The Royals” were sold at the party to benefit Kelley’s longtime cause celebre, the nonprofit Legal and Education Fund of Washington Independent Writers.

The Fare: No fish and chips and no kidney pies, just plenty of all-American hand-carved turkey and ham, hot biscuits, fruit platters and cheeses. Silver trays of teeny, creamy pastries were washed down with gallons of California Chardonnay and Heineken beer. One publishing magnate rushed to the bar and demanded, “A double martini--fast!” The anxious-to-please bartender, with no hard liquor at hand, offered water with an olive instead. “In one of our lovely martini glasses,” he cooed, “I can assure you, no one will know the difference.”

The Dress: Black-on-black narrow, narrow suits with short, short skirts for the ladies--Kelley’s was handmade for the occasion by Mirella of Italy (who made a similar outfit for her “Nancy Reagan” book party in 1991)--and white button-downs with rep ties and wingtips for the gentlemen. Pearls, the emblem of a true Beltway insider, were on every neck worth noting.

The Lines: The line of book-toting admirers waiting for autographs wrapped twice around the buffet table. But “Royals” publisher Maureen Egen assured them they weren’t wasting their time. “She is the best investigative journalist in the world. . . . It’s worth [the wait] to have Kitty Kelley smile at you.” And not write about you, she might have added.

Kitty Declawed: “I don’t know whether it’s harder to write a book or to stand up and defend it,” the author said. “I do know that I value being an American citizen more than ever and I am proud to be the American author who does not curtsy to her subjects.”