Maybe He Can Light a Fire Under the Rockies

Jim Leyland, who recently resigned as Florida Marlin manager, is a heavy smoker, and this worries Mike Littwin of Rocky Mountain News:

“If the Rockies persuade free-agent manager Leyland to replace Don Baylor--and they’re already taking bids from moving companies--they are prepared to issue another statement; that it is possible to manage successfully at Coors Field, although you might need two or three packs of smokes a game to get it done.

“Personally, I fear for Leyland’s health. Does anyone know the record for most total cups of coffee/packs of cigarettes for a single 13-11 Coors Field game? I can just say if he comes, it’s wonderful news for area convenience stores, and possibly for the New England Journal of Medicine.”

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Trivia time: What do Saddi Washington, Muntrell Dobbins, Carlos Strong, Fred Hoiberg and Aaron Swinson have in common?

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Winning is everything: Larry Bird, who was inducted into the Basketball Hall of Fame on Friday, is a St. Louis Cardinal fan. He’s also frustrated.

“I loved what Mark McGwire was doing,” he told Sam Smith of the Chicago Tribune, “but why the heck weren’t they in the playoffs?

“It broke my heart, him hitting all those home runs, the fans packing the stadium, all that going on. I want them in the playoffs. . . . You can accomplish all that stuff. But it means nothing unless you’re winning.”

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It has come to this: Jay Leno: “The Senate passed a bill to honor McGwire by renaming a section of Interstate 70 in Missouri after him. This is not the first time they’ve done this. We named a street here in L.A. after the Dodgers--skid row.”

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The good life: Florida Panther center Rob Niedermayer, upset by rumors that he might be traded: “I don’t want to go anywhere. I want to be able to play golf year-round.”

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Remember me? Ben Lardizabel, an all-City Section lineman from Manual Arts in 1944, will be among those honored by the school’s alumni Thursday at a luncheon at Steven’s Steak House in Commerce.

Lardizabel played for USC in 1945 and didn’t play again for the school until 1956 and 1957, at which time he was 32 years old, reportedly the oldest Trojan ever to play football. His college career was interrupted because of naval service.

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Looking back: On this day in 1980, UCLA upset second-ranked Ohio State, 17-0, at Columbus.

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Trivia answer: They are the No. 1 overall draft choices in the Continental Basketball Assn. the last five years.

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And finally: From the SportsLetter of the Amateur Athletic Foundation of Los Angeles:

“Arnold Schwarzenegger’s dirty little secret is curling, and we don’t mean the exercise you do with dumbbells.”

David Webster reveals the ugly truth in his 1979 book “Barbells and Beefcake.” Arnold, he writes, “first showed promise as an ice curler, his father, a police inspector, being the European curling champion.”