A Lego Structure That Caved In

Stop right there, kids: Put your snow cones and cotton candy down and your hands above your heads. You have the right to remain silent. . . .

Well, it didn’t quite come to that. But it turns out that the pint-size visitors to Legoland, as well as their parents, were looking at an unauthorized attraction--the miniature Hollywood sign.

The Carlsbad theme park had constructed it without permission of the Hollywood Chamber of Commerce, which owns the trademark rights thereto (as the attorneys put it). Chamber boss Leron Gubler said Legoland was recently asked to remove the replica because “Universal Studios has the exclusive right to use the sign in theme parks.”

So the miniature landmark has disappeared. Let’s hope this doesn’t give revelers any ideas about the sign in Hollywood.

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MUST BE A MED SCHOOL DROPOUT: “After two days of jury selection I was relieved to be excused from what should have been an interesting case,” writes Trina Williams of Fountain Valley. “The defense attorney had admonished nearly every prospective juror not to ‘listen with a jaundiced ear.’ ”

Or watch with a deaf eye.

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ENEMIES OF THE NIGHT: Mention was made here of a study of residents near Heathrow Airport in England that found just 5% were awakened by airport noise, compared with 17% by flushing toilets. The study was in an environmental review of the proposed El Toro airport by Orange County, which was trying to defuse the noise issue.

Anyway, Philippe Brieu of Westwood says: “I guess the folks in England don’t have the same type of car alarms we do here, because they’re definitely the No. 1 cause for me to wake up (after earthquakes).”

Indeed, the British study didn’t even mention car alarms. Or earthquakes.

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ON THE ROAD: Douglas Fennell of La Mirada came upon this bulletin in a Central California newspaper:

“An officer responded to a report of grand theft in the 300 block of McMurray Road. Ronald McDonald and his bench were stolen from McDonald’s restaurant.”

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KISS THAT FORTUNE GOODBYE: I heard of one poll that indicated many people expect to strike it rich by winning a lottery. I couldn’t help thinking of those who never realized they had the chance--unclaimed Lotto prizes in California over the last decade included tickets worth $16.4 million (purchased in Garden Grove, Sept. 12, 1990), $6.44 million (Montebello, Sept. 23, 1992), $4 million (Corona, April 5, 1995) and $4 million (Anaheim, May 27, 1998).

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NOW THE WHOLE WORLD KNOWS: Incredibly, Newsweek columnist George Will felt it necessary to put the spotlight on the dismal baseball seasons of the Dodgers and Angels in his review of 1999.

Will quoted a local TV sports anchor who said, “Dodgers and Angels highlights at 11. Please watch anyway.”

miscelLAny:

Here’s Only in L.A.’s annual New Year’s Eve warning (see accompanying).

Go easy if you have a yearning for some Canadian Blub (a brand brought to my attention by Virgilius Kasper. Just think of the potential hangover. That must have been on the mind of the guy who printed the “Champain” ad (contributed by James Cooper).

Nothing wrong with a bit of wine, though I’m not sure I’d pick the version noticed by Lisalee Anne Wells--especially if it was inspired by the car of the same name.

And I’d definitely consider the specialty found by Marilyn Reardon: the nonalcoholic meat plate.