Concerns Seem Remarkably Similar

We joke. We laugh. We compare and contrast. It’s only natural to pick apart the differences between the suburban Mighty Ducks and the downtown Kings.

It’s easy to point out that the Ducks hail from the land of Republican, minivan-driving soccer moms while the Kings call the gritty core of the nation’s second-largest city home. But the truth is our local teams have a lot more in common than either club’s faithful followers would care to admit.

Only their fans are remarkably different, the Ducks attracting more reserved and conservative families and the Kings attracting more twentysomethings who struggle to string two sentences together without including nine or 10 profanities.

If the teams’ two meetings proved anything last week, it’s this: Neither the Ducks nor Kings can afford even the slightest glitch if they hope to stay competitive and earn playoff berths. Neither is a league power. Neither is even a conference or division championship contender at this point. Both probably would consider making the playoffs a satisfying conclusion to 2000-01.

Joke all you want, but these teams are in the same precarious situation. Despite the Kings’ 2-0 edge in the season series, there is no significant difference between the teams as of the end of October.

The Ducks, who are 6-4-1-2 for 15 points, and Kings (5-5-2, 12 points) each must top 90 points to qualify for the playoffs. They must soon smooth out the rough edges in their games. The Ducks must answer the annual question: Who, aside from Paul Kariya and Teemu Selanne, is going to score? The Kings must re-sign defenseman Rob Blake before his contract squabble damages the dressing-room chemistry beyond repair.

There’s simply too much at stake for either to survive even the slightest stumble. Look at the standings. To be sure, there are a couple of pushovers, including the expansion Columbus Blue Jackets and Minnesota Wild. But notice how many teams are .500 or better? Notice how many more teams in the Western Conference are above .500 than in the Eastern Conference?

“I look in the standings and in the West, there’s four teams under .500,” Duck President and General Manager Pierre Gauthier said before the Kings’ impressive 6-2 victory over the Ducks last Wednesday. “In the East, there’s five teams over .500. It tells you something about the competitiveness of our conference.”

“The league is very equal,” Duck Coach Craig Hartsburg said. “Every night you play a team that’s very similar to your own skill-wise and depth-wise. It’s going to come down to a lot of little things--injuries, chemistry. A lot of little factors are going to turn out to be very big things.”

It means the Ducks’ youngsters, such as forwards Matt Cullen and Mike Leclerc and defensemen Oleg Tverdovsky and Vitaly Vishnevski, must become impact players. If not, Gauthier must seek out new impact players through trades.

And it means the Kings must avoid injuries to key players such as Blake, Ziggy Palffy and Luc Robitaille. Blake already has sat out a couple of games because of a back injury. Goaltender Stephane Fiset also has been sidelined because of a knee injury.

The biggest stumbling block for General Manager Dave Taylor is resolving Blake’s contract situation. Getting something done sooner rather than later would eliminate potential trouble down the road. The time is now for a fat new deal for the King captain. He has earned it.

WHAT WAS HARRY THINKING?

Pat Burns getting canned by the Boston Bruins last week was not much of a surprise. He almost got fired after the Bruins missed the playoffs last season. Then there was the small matter of the Marty McSorley debacle, which was in no way Burns’ fault. But it certainly didn’t reflect well on Burns or the Bruins.

So, Bruin President Harry Sinden hauled off and hired “Iron” Mike Keenan in an attempt to give the Bruins a makeover. To be sure, Sinden wanted to dump Burns’ dull defensive style of play in favor of Keenan’s more wide-open game plan. Keenan says he wants the Bruins shooting the puck more.

But how in the world will two of the game’s strongest personalities possibly work together to improve the Bruins? Most observers believe it will go badly.

Keenan ended the New York Rangers’ 54-year Stanley Cup drought with a championship in 1994. He also took the Chicago Blackhawks and Philadelphia Flyers to the finals. But he left the St. Louis Blues and Vancouver Canucks in ruins after brief attempts at coaching and playing general manager.

Keenan’s old-style intimidation and penchant for front-office meddling almost certainly will result in a very short tenure with Sinden and the Bruins.

Not that Keenan was anything short of optimistic after leading the Bruins to a victory over the Washington Capitals in his debut last week. “I plan on being here a long time, probably ending my career here,” he said Saturday during a between-periods feature on “Hockey Night in Canada.”

PAT’S NOT DONE JUST YET

Burns probably is best remembered in the Southland as Barry Melrose’s foil during the scintillating Kings-Toronto Maple Leafs Western Conference final in 1993. Melrose called the rather beefy Burns “Fat Burns” during the seven-game series.

However, Melrose has been cooped up in ESPN’s studios while Burns continues to feel passionately about coaching in the NHL.

“I could leave right now from here, jump in my truck and go to the next city,” Burns said at his own news conference two days after the Bruins let him go. “I’m ready to coach right now.”

What’s that old saying about coaches being hired to be fired?

HOW’S YOUR NOGGIN, ERIC?

Reports from Toronto indicate Eric Lindros has been skating three times a week at a local rink, which should start the rumor mill spinning wildly out of control in the coming days, weeks and months.

If Lindros’ concussion troubles are fading, then rumors of a trade of the unsigned restricted free agent are certain to follow.

Bob Clarke, Philadelphia’s general manager, indicated last week that the Flyers aren’t done trying to re-sign Lindros. The words were barely out of Clarke’s mouth before the laughter spread from coast to coast on both sides of the border. There’s been too much ill will between Clarke and the Lindros family to heal old wounds with talk of a new deal at this late date.

Expect the Toronto Maple Leafs and New York Rangers to be among those in heavy negotiations to trade for and sign Lindros once James Kelly, a Chicago concussion specialist, clears the talented center to play. Lindros won’t go to the highest bidder, though. He’ll go to the Maple Leafs.

AND SPEAKING OF THE RANGERS

Even the usually dispassionate New York Times has been hammering away on the Brutal Broadway Blues, calling the Rangers “the worst team money can buy” after a dismal 4-1 loss Friday on ESPN to the Pittsburgh Penguins.

The $60-million Rangers are old, slow, fat and happy because they’ve been handed bloated contracts that remove hunger from even the most conscientious players.

Coach Ron Low ripped into Theoren Fleury, a bust since signing with New York in the summer of 1999, for taking a slashing penalty in the Pittsburgh game.

“We’re looking at this very seriously,” Low said. “We have to get the message across whether it’s taking him out of the lineup or reducing his ice time. We can’t keep doing this.”

Money isn’t the solution to the Rangers’ woes. It’s the reason they are 4-6 and mired in last place in the Atlantic Division.

HE SHOOTS, HE SCORES . . . MORE OFTEN

Through the first 132 games played this season, the NHL reports goal scoring is on the rise again, up 8% over last season and 16% over 1998-99.

An average of 5.7 goals per game have been scored, up from 5.3 last season and 4.9 in ‘98-99. What’s more, there only have been 13 shutouts compared to 18 at this point last season and 28 in ‘98-99.

All of which is good news for fans of the beautiful game and bad news for fans of clutching, grabbing, slashing and hacking.