PIGSKIN PROPHECIES

All right, so I stink. Big deal. They say losing builds character. After my opening-week debacle, I’m the biggest character in town. But revenge will be sweet against the ink-stained rabble. Speaking of rabble, this week’s challenger is Tim Trepany, whose job is to make sure mistakes don’t get in the paper. Apparently his football picks don’t count. As far as I can tell, Tim passes the time by drinking large cups of water and watching “Big Brother” on TV. I think he identifies with George. Borrowing from that show’s theme, we’re asking readers to call and vote to have a pigskin prognosticator removed from the premises. Please call: 1-800-DUMP-TIM.

The Prophet

Season totals for the Prophet: 7 of 15 (47%), 7 points

Tim Trepany

Season totals for the guests: 12 of 15 (80%), 16 points

GAME OF THE WEEK (5 points)

Reseda at Cleveland

THE PROPHET SAYS: Both teams are 1-0, and why wouldn’t they be? Cleveland has a terrific tailback, Matthew Clark. Reseda has a coaching genius, Joel Schaeffer, and a terrific tailback, Eddie Robinson, who, if I’m not mistaken, won a lot of games as the coach at Grambling. Trouble brews when Schaeffer and Robinson can’t agree on the play-calling. Cleveland, 28-21.

TREPANY SAYS: Let me be the first to reveal The False Prophet’s bias against Joel Schaeffer. Reseda could have Kurt Warner and Marshall Faulk in the backfield and the Prophet would pick against the Regents, just to tweak the coach. This contest will be the second-most lopsided of the season after Joel Huerto vs. The Prophet last week. Reseda, 42-6.

OTHER TOP GAMES (each 3 points)

Palmdale at Kennedy

THE PROPHET SAYS: Palmdale hits the road, and that has to be cause for celebration if you live in Palmdale. The Falcons need to guard against becoming overly giddy on their field trip, because pass-happy Kennedy has a potent offense. But I’m picking the out-of-towners. Palmdale, 31-27.

TREPANY SAYS: Receiver James Norris of Kennedy, at 5 feet 6, is the biggest pint-sized pest this side of Eric Sondheimer. You don’t want to be alone on the corner against Norris just like you don’t want to hear Sondheimer complaining about how his column has been edited. Kennedy, 42-35.

*

St. Francis vs. Crescenta Valley at Glendale High

THE PROPHET SAYS: Crescenta Valley faces a touted quarterback for the second week in a row, which must be getting old for the defensive backs. The Falcons prevailed last week against Ben Olson of Thousand Oaks, but they’re in for a long night against John Sciarra of St. Francis, perhaps the best QB in the region. St. Francis, 34-21.

TREPANY SAYS: St. Francis has one of the region’s toughest combinations: Coach Jim Bonds, quarterback John Sciarra, tight end Nathan Terrazone, the Jesuits. Crescenta Valley doesn’t have a prayer. St. Francis, 30-13.

*

Canyon at Granada Hills

THE PROPHET SAYS: Coach Jack Bowman is trying to return Canyon to its glory days under legendary Harry Welch, but he has a ways to go. I mean, Bowman hasn’t even gotten into a fight with a parent or conducted an illegal practice. But the Cowboys are making strides. Canyon, 26-21.

TREPANY SAYS: Behind the running of Bryan Wilson, who had seven carries for 88 yards against North Hollywood, it will be like a day at the beach for Granada Hills. Co-Coach Tom Harp just needs to make sure Wilson gets the ball as much as possible. Granada Hills, 32-8.

THE REST (1 point each)

* Locke at Taft: The Prophet: Locke, which once had a player named Sirr Parker, must find a way to slow Taft’s football royalty--super sophomore WR Steve Smith and QB Ricky Clausen. Taft, 22-14. Trepany: Taft, 29-6.

* Alemany at Chatsworth: The Prophet: Poor Alemany. The Indians are small, play poor defense and can’t pass to save their lives. Star RB De’Andre Scott will see eight- and nine-man fronts the entire season. This will be one of their few victories. Alemany, 28-21. Trepany: Chatsworth, 14-10.

* Thousand Oaks vs. Hart at College of the Canyons: The Prophet: Forget the officiating. Hart’s disappointing 36-6 victory over Monroe was the result of the Herringtons spending too much time this summer playing Nintendo instead of poring over game film. Hart, 7-6. Trepany: Thousand Oaks, 42-32.

* St. Monica vs. Paraclete at Antelope Valley College: The Prophet: Trepany, a St. Monica grad, dug up his old letterman’s jacket for the occasion. Unfortunately, it’s three sizes too small. Paraclete will win if new Coach Jeff Cortez cuts out the gimmick plays and gives the damn ball to RB Curtis Brown. Paraclete, 28-14. Trepany: St. Monica, 56-0.

* Bakersfield Centennial at Highland: The Prophet: Highland earned The Prophet’s wrath by getting waxed by Valencia last week. Here’s the punishment. Bakersfield Centennial, 35-7. Trepany: Bakersfield Centennial, 14-0.

* Valencia at Peninsula: The Prophet: Picking against Valencia last week was perhaps my biggest blunder. Picking against the Vikings this week is based on the fact that talented Peninsula is always tough to beat in the afternoon at home. Peninsula, 27-21. Trepany: Valencia, 20-15.

* Newbury Park at Paso Robles: The Prophet: A long bus ride and a formidable opponent do not add up to a winning trip for Newbury Park. Paso Robles, 14-10. Trepany: Newbury Park, 26-21.

* El Camino Real at Chaminade: The Prophet: El Camino Real’s 40-6 hammering at the hands of Jefferson (Jefferson?) does not bode well for its season. Chaminade, 28-14. Trepany: Chaminade, 35-28.

* Crespi vs. St. Bonaventure at Ventura High: The Prophet: What numskull scheduled this game? There’s no way the worst Mission League team can hang with the Tri-Valley League champion. St. Bonaventure, 36-10. Trepany: St. Bonaventure, 63-14.

* Channel Islands at Royal: The Prophet: The fact that these teams, which were a combined 6-15 last season, won their openers is a sure sign the apocalypse is near. Royal, 21-14. Trepany: Channel Islands, 19-13.

* Westlake vs. Clovis West at Clovis Buchanan High: The Prophet: Westlake, as usual, got lucky last week against Buena. It will be a different story against one of the state’s top teams. Clovis West, 21-7. Trepany: Westlake, 34-32.