CHRIS DUFRESNE’S TOP 25

1. Nebraska (3-0) So now you’re suggesting Eric Crouch can throw, too?

2. Florida State (4-0) Missed Thursday night game; out shopping at Dillard’s.

3. Florida (4-0) Spurrier said to be recruiting a speedy Aussie named Freeman.

4. Virginia Tech (3-0) B.C. has as much chance vs. Vick as a clam does in chowder.

5. Washington (3-0) We hear Oregon hates Neuheisel more than toxic waste.

6. USC (3-0) School brings bread crumbs to find way back from Oregon State.

7. Texas (2-1) Now, 48-0 over Houston is what the Sam Houston we’re talking about.

8. Clemson (4-0) Counting the touchdowns until Tommy plays at Daddy’s house on Nov. 4.

9. Ohio State (4-0) Lookie here: only two wins short of matching last year’s total.

10. Michigan (3-1) Carr against instant replay. Repeat: Carr against instant replay.

11. Kansas State (4-0) IOC probe of schedule finds no performance-enhancing substances.

12. Oklahoma (3-0) Rankman hears the Boz’s pregame pep talk left some players Stone Cold.

13. Tennessee (2-1) Fulmer is in a pickle at QB with Clausen in the equation.

14. Wisconsin (3-1) Badgers file labor lawsuit after working OT on consecutive weekends.

15. Oregon (3-1) Scouts patrol Willamette River for possible Washington sneak attack.

16. UCLA (3-1) Bruins fall faster and harder than U.S. gymnastics teams.

17. Miami (3-1) Not looking past Rutgers to Florida State (yeah, right).

18. Texas Christian (3-0) The fellas have come a long way since the days of TCWho?

19. Auburn (4-0) A couple more wins and they rename the town Tuberville.

20. Purdue (3-1) Brees looks to pad Heisman numbers at State (of panic) College.

21. South Carolina (4-0) Holtz says 1-3 Alabama reminds him a lot of 1979 Pittsburgh Steelers.

22. Illinois (3-1) Refs blow foot fault call against Ron Turner in Big Ten bowling league.

23. Southern Mississippi (2-1) Team is hotter than Hattiesburg right now.

24. Texas Tech (4-0) The lowdown from Lubbock: Red Raiders haven’t played anyone yet.

25a. Notre Dame (2-2) Do we have a shot against Stanford and USC this year, Jose?

25b. San Jose State (2-2) Stanford was no sweat, USC was no sweat for three quarters.