Their Good Friend Phil Didn’t Have as Easy a Way Out

In his next life, assuming all the breaks do eventually even out for everyone in the end, Phil Mickelson gets to come back as a golf commentator.

In this world, as opposed to Mickelson’s current unhappy lot, mistakes are forgiven on the final hole of a major tournament.

Here, accuracy is encouraged, but not required.

Here, you shank one on the 18th, they cut to a commercial and then you get another chance to try to get it right.

On the 18th hole of Sunday’s final round of the PGA Championship, this was the situation confronting David Toms: A one-stroke lead to protect, a second shot from the rough on the right of the fairway, the flagstick beckoning well beyond a massive water hazard and a retaining wall.

“One of the most terrifying shots you’ll see at a major,” CBS’ Jim Nantz somberly intoned.

As Toms conferred with his caddie, fidgeting over his club selection, the CBS crew talked strategy.

Nantz: “Would he be considering lay-up at all here, guys?”

David Feherty: “I don’t think he can [afford to] lay up, Jimmy. No, it’s a situation where he’s only a shot in front . . . I’d rather see him at least on the other side of the water.”

Toms decided he’d rather not. Putting the five-wood back his bag, he chose to lay up short of the water.

“Interesting decision,” Nantz observed with a tone that suggested Toms had left the door open for Mickelson, one stroke back and about to clear the water with his second shot.

Mickelson had his chance, a 25-foot putt for birdie, a share of the lead and a playoff.

Nantz: “Phil has that kind of look right now. He just might hole this one.”

Ken Venturi: “I can tell you this. Knowing Mickelson, I would be very, very surprised if he ever left it short. The [second-place] money you can spend, but that’s what they’re playing for, right there. (Camera zooms in on the Wanamaker Trophy.) You put your name on that and go down in history.”

Mickelson lined up over the ball, gave it a knock with his putter.

And left it short.

Toms, who played it conservatively, who reached the green in three, needed to sink a 12-foot putt for the championship, which he did.

If you’re keeping score, marks on that final hole read:

Toms: Par--and his first major championship.

Mickelson: Par--and nothing to show for it except 13,864 more references about “the monkey on his back” from here to the 2002 Masters.

CBS: Double-bogey.

Wrong twice in the clutch, CBS at least had the good humor to acknowledge it.

“And now we’ll say, when [Toms] laid up, ‘That’s the smartest move I’ve ever seen,’ ” Venturi quipped. “Oh boy, was he smart. People were second-guessing it--now everybody will be the authority. But what a move, what a play. And what a disappointment there for Phil Mickelson.”

As well as for CBS, now that everyone’s coming clean here. Last month at the British Open, ABC had its soft-focus moment with David Duval, who got rid of the Best Player to Never Win a Major ball-and-chain and shackled it to Mickelson. CBS wanted that same moment for itself. And all weekend, Mickelson seemed ready to deliver, if not for that pesky no-name Toms.

“It’s happened again,” Nantz noted, sounding sadder than Mickelson about the latest near miss.

Trying to brighten the mood, Nantz asked his partner, “What positives do you feel he takes from this, Kenny?”

“I think he’s got a lot of negatives,” Venturi replied. “I think he’s very hurt by the whole thing. He’s such a wonderful young man. With his humility and his strength, he’ll overcome it. But it’ll take a while, because it’s got to be a big disappointment, Jimmy.”

Kenny and Jimmy, by the way, are two members of the chummiest cast of sports commentators you’ll run across. If you’ve ever wondered how an NHL locker room (“Way to go, Blakey”) might call a major professional golf tournament, you should have listened this weekend as Kenny and Jimmy bantered with Bobby (that would be Clampett) and Lanny (that would be Wadkins) and Oostie (that would be Peter Oosterhuis).

One sequence during Saturday’s third-round coverage:

Kenny: “[Mickelson] is hitting ‘em close enough, I can make ‘em, Jimmy.”

Jimmy: “Let’s go out to Bobby Clampett on 15.”

Bobby: “Thank you, Jimmy . . . “

Kenny: “Now, Bobby, this is the time, I feel, you come into ‘course management.’ . . . This is where you have to know exactly what you’re doing.”

Bobby: “That’s exactly right, Kenny. And it certainly depends a lot on what club you have and how you feel about that club. Mickelson with a four-iron, Lanny.”

Lanny: “Well, it’s a shot he’s got to hit, Bobby, and make sure the water’s out of play.”

This CBS crew is big on team chemistry, big on nicknames. For them, Shingo Katayama, the surprising fourth-place finisher, was heaven sent.

When Katayama saved par on the 18th hole to cap an all-day scramble on Saturday, Nantz couldn’t help himself.

After Katayama bounced his approach shot off the water and onto the grass in front of the green: “And Bingo is his name!”

After Katayama sank the putt that finished off a wild round of 69: “Bingo!”

And on Sunday, after Katayama clinched a spot in the 2002 Masters field with his fourth-place finish, Nantz succumbed again: “There will be Shingo-mania at the Masters!”

Mickelson, you would have to imagine, can hardly wait.