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Gadgets That Beep and Buzz

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TIMES STAFF WRITER

In the sentimental and irresistible 1950 film “The Goldbergs,” there’s a dinnertime scene during which Jake Goldberg talks about his hopes for the future. He tells his adored wife, Molly, he wishes he could buy her dinner plates made of gold.

Molly turns to him and asks, “Would the food taste any better?”

Which brings us to the subject of high-tech appliances that kitchen shops, mail-order catalogs and Internet sites are offering this holiday season. Equipped with microchips and digital readouts, these devices are designed to do tasks formerly done with old-fashioned analog machines--or sometimes no machines at all.

Is there really a need for a “fuzzy logic” rice cooker, electronic cocktail jigger or digital coffee scoop?

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To find out, we gathered together a group of home cooks--some of whom love gadgets and others who hate the idea of any kitchen item that comes with a manual. We found that some of these devices--ranging in price from $20 to $1,200--are just plain useless and even hilarious.

But there are a few even Molly would have loved.

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Coffee/Espresso

FrancisFrancis! X4 Espresso Machine ($1,195.99 at Williams-Sonoma) is the most expensive item in our test, and it looks it. With a stainless-steel body that is part Art Deco and part industrial chic, this handsome machine is a lovely kitchen sculpture. But can it make coffee? Yes, and very well, although the coffee snob in the group (me) sniffed that the finished product could have used a bit more crema.

But the machine’s high-tech component--which allows the viewing of the exact operating temperature and lets you program the X4 to go into “sleep cycle” between uses--is largely digital window dressing. If you like the styling of the FrancisFrancis!, the analogue X1 version at about $500 is the same basic machine. In fact, it looks even cooler, with its retro toggle switches and circular temperature dial.

Smart Coffee Scoop ($20 at Brookstone) is one of those items that got lots of laughs from the test group. The device’s handle includes a digital readout that simply lets you know how many scoops per cup to use. For example, if you want to make four cups of “medium” strength coffee, it tells you to use four scoops and for a stronger brew, use five. This one rates high on the “duh” scale.

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Meat Thermometer

Remote Thermometer ($54 at Williams-Sonoma) is a digital meat thermometer with a little transmitter that sends a wireless signal to a tabletop unit (about the size of a kitchen timer) that you can carry into the next room. When your roast reaches the optimum temperature--you can go with their built-in settings, which can lead to overdoneness in some cases, or set your own--a beeping alarm is triggered. The idea is that you can be with your guests and not worry about checking the oven every few minutes.

It works wonderfully well, but it’d be even nicer if you could wear the receiver on a belt like a pager. Then you could ask the crowd, “Is that my agent calling or is the turkey done?”

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Rice

National Electronic Rice Cooker/Warmer ($199 at Williams-Sonoma) is a winner, albeit a pricey one. This machine supposedly uses fuzzy-logic microchip technology to adjust to varying conditions. But whatever makes it work, the Calrose rice used for the test turned out perfectly fluffy and fragrant. And, best of all, the unit’s warmer cycle keeps the rice in pristine condition for at least three hours (don’t try this feature with brown rice, which can go bad when kept under constant heat). The ergonomics of the oval-shaped machine also gets high marks.

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Wine/Mixed Drinks

Digital Wine Thermometer ($24.95 at Sharper Image) is a handy item with a flaw. It not only takes the temperature of the wine in the bottle, it tells you if that particular vino is at the optimum temperature for imbibing. The problem is that the bottle needs to be uncorked for the device to work. Thus, if the wine needs further cooling, the bottle needs to be recorked and returned to the fridge. A wine connoisseur might not approve.

Wine Smart ($20 at Brookstone) is a pocket-sized device that has a digital screen to suggest the type of wine that would be appropriate to serve with various foods. Not a bad idea, but it is odd that it comes attached to a key ring. As my friend John noted, “It’s just the thing for those who are planning to drink and drive.”

Bar Smart Cocktail Jigger ($35 at Brookstone) is a regular jigger with directions for 40 cocktails programmed into its digital-screen-equipped handle. Some of the recipes are a bit mysterious. The Bar Smart’s margarita calls for regular instead of sweetened lime juice and there is no mention of ice. The result is a room temperature, quite sour, margarita.

So, when all was said and done and the dessert (a chocolate sorbet, made with a hand-cranked ice cream machine sans anything digital) was served, the question remained: Did the food taste better?

No. Everything we did could have been made as well or better with analog equipment. But the rice maker, remote thermometer and wine thermometer made our tasks easier and a bit more fun.

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And we’ll be laughing about the coffee scoop for years.

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