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Sometimes a Little Mistake Steals Past Everyone--Just on Principal

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Kids, don’t spell this way: In less-than-inspiring letters sent to who knows how many schools, the U.S. Department of Education misspelled the word “principal” on the envelopes (see accompanying).

Recipients I heard from included Our Lady of the Valley School in Canoga Park, Southwestern Academy in San Marino and Palms Middle School in West L.A.

Ken Veronda of Southwestern Academy asked: “Is Dan Quayle the new secretary of education?”

One office wag at Palms said: “Perhaps the Department of Education needs to pass a Stanford 9 test too.”

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Toro! Toro! Toro! How big is the controversy over whether to build an airport at El Toro? Well, it figures in T. Jefferson Parker’s current bestseller, “Silent Joe.”

After the murder of Orange County Supervisor Will Trona in the novel, his widow wonders if Trona’s opposition to El Toro might have been a motive.

“What about the airport, Joe?” she asks her son, a sheriff’s deputy. “Will would have gone to some lengths to throw a monkey wrench into that.”

And I’ve discovered a John Shannon murder mystery, “The Orange Curtain,” that deals with a pro-El Toro airport activist who has disappeared.

Asks detective Jack Liffey: “Is this airport feud bad enough to get people hurt or kidnapped?”

Or to inspire a third novel?

From toro to cow: Donna Ford of Mission Hills and Jan Mauk of La Crescenta came upon an ad for a muumuu that had been given a bovine interpretation (see accompanying).

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Perfecting the brushoff: Perusing “The Hollywood Job Hunter’s Survival Guide,” John Hendry of Van Nuys was amused by the tips to Tinseltown assistants on how to shield the boss from undesirable phone callers.

“Unfortunately, once in a while, it may be necessary to tell a small fib to someone who’s calling your office,” writes author Hugh Taylor. “You aren’t really lying. It’s all part of the game. If you are deeply troubled by this idea, you might be in the wrong business.”

Anyway, among the “good phrases you can use to explain that your boss will have to call them back” are:

* “He’s in a casting session.”

* “She’s on an international conference call.”

And one that’s perfect for this era and area:

* “He’s in his car and he’s driving through the canyon, so I can’t connect you.”

miscelLAny: Like the Department of Education, I’m far from perfect. In an item on broadcast bloopers Wednesday, I committed one myself, as reader Vivian Lindner and others noted.

I was recounting how announcer Durward Kirby, in introducing a sponsor named the Bond Bread Bakers, inadvertently said, “The Blond Bed Breakers are on the air.”

Only I said the sponsor’s real name was Bond Break Bakers.

Let’s take a break from this column and try again tomorrow.

*

Durward Harvey can be reached at (800) LA-TIMES, Ext. 77083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, 202 W. 1st St., L.A., 90012 and by e-mail at steve.harvey@latimes.com.

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