What’s Missing Is a Little Suspense

We aren’t asking much, only that some school, coach, investigative reporter, player or used-car dealer step up this weekend and produce a headline that sends this season Keith Jackson-rumbling, fumbling and/or bumbling toward a chaotic conclusion. A playoff-less sport deserves no less but, frankly, time is running out.

There have been a few borderline BCS derailments, notably a DUI arrest in Columbus that might have cost Ohio State the Big Ten title and that lend (car) lease program at UCLA, yet nothing to get our hearts pumping. Where are the decimal point disputes, the bowl championship series outrage?

Oh, how we pine for 1997, when a pass that bounced off a player’s foot launched Nebraska to a share of the national title. Give us a phantom fifth down, or a blown official’s call that causes a contender to flip-flop in the polls.

Bring back 1998, when three games on the first Saturday in December gripped the nation and had everyone, even Florida State Coach Bobby Bowden, bolted to his recliner. Give us last year, when Miami was jobbed out of the national title game by .32 in the BCS computer.

As it stands, this year’s race is about as thrilling as a Yankee pennant chase or Congressman Tom Osborne (R-Neb.) conducting a soy bean seminar. College football, outside of hamlets Lincoln, Coral Gables and Norman, is a snooze because front-runners Nebraska, Miami and Oklahoma have refused to buckle.

These traditional powers have combined for almost as many national titles as Dennis Rodman has tattoos. In other words, where’s the fun in that? Two key games this weekend offer some of the last best hopes to wreak havoc that can give outsiders like Oregon and Texas a reason to keep hoping:* Nebraska (11-0) at Colorado (8-2): This Friday foray at Folsom Field only looks like a turkey shoot because Colorado hasn’t posted a victory in this series since 1990. But, dig deeper, and you’ll discover why the Buffaloes stand a good chance of pulling off the upset against the BCS’ top-ranked team.

Colorado has lost its last five games against Nebraska by a total of 15 points and, if you believe the game notes, 23 Buffalo seniors are tired of it.

“The time has come,” Colorado safety Robbie Robinson proclaimed this week.

Colorado quarterback Craig Ochs is out because of an ankle injury, but backup Bobby Pesavento has been excellent in relief, throwing for 921 yards in six touchdowns. Also, Colorado matches up well at the point of attack. The Cornhuskers lead the nation in rushing at 311 yards a game, but rank 112th in passing. Colorado is 20th nationally against the run, giving up 109 yards a game.

Any two-bit writer or Junior All-American coach could tell you Colorado has to stack the defensive front with eight men and make Cornhusker quarterback Eric Crouch beat you with his arm.

National impact: A Colorado victory sends the Buffaloes to the Big 12 title game, probably against Oklahoma. Oklahoma can’t get as large a BCS bounce with a victory against Colorado as it could by defeating Nebraska, which could open the door for one-loss Florida to jump the Sooners.

* Washington (8-2) at Miami (9-0): We don’t like Washington on the road nearly as much as we like Colorado at home, but Rick Neuheisel’s team is coming off a big victory over Washington State in the Apple Cup and is far better prepared to face Miami now. Remember, the Miami game had to be rescheduled after events of Sept. 11.

Since, Washington sophomore quarterback Cody Pickett has matured substantially and won’t be nearly as intimidated headed to South Florida.

“I’ve gained more confidence in myself,” Pickett says. “It’s just the experience, being in different situations.”

Pickett passed for 371 yards last week.

Washington is 3-0 against teams ranked in the BCS top 15, having beaten Michigan, Stanford and Washington State. Also, Washington isn’t likely to get knock-kneed over Miami’s mystique. The Huskies have won the only two previous meetings, ending Miami’s NCAA-record 58-game home winning streak in 1994 and handing the Hurricanes their only loss last season. Miami has won 19 in a row since.

“No question, we’ve developed a little persona,” Neuheisel said. “It’s not as though we haven’t played in the arena.”

National impact: A Washington victory would probably knock Miami out of the national title hunt and give other one-loss teams--Florida, Texas, Oregon, Tennessee--a chance to grab a Rose Bowl spot.

And Then There’s This

We’re not big on assigning themes for halftime band shows, but how about “Dog Day Afternoon” for Friday’s big rumble in Piscataway between California and Rutgers? This is worse holiday weekend fare than 4-year-old fruitcake.

Thankfully, the game won’t be televised; it’s a makeup for the game scheduled for Sept. 15. Honestly, no one would have complained had this East Coast-West Coast tilt been canceled via conference call.

How bad is it? California is 0-10 and recently accepted the resignation of Coach Tom Holmoe. Incredibly, though, the Bears are a double-digit favorite, on the road! The Scarlet Knights have been able to cobble nonconference victories against Buffalo and Navy but have lost Big East Conference games by scores of 61-0, 50-0, 42-0 and 80-7. Even lowly Temple routed Rutgers, 30-5. And Temple is getting kicked out of the Big East? Friday’s matchup pits Rutgers’ No. 115 scoring offense (11.33 points a game) against Cal’s 114th-ranking scoring defense (42.9 points a game).

They say it’s a game of inches, right?

Well, in Rutgers’ 80-7 thrashing by West Virginia, the Scarlet Knights averaged 43 inches per play.

The game does feature a cautionary tale about coaching moves. Greg Schiano gave up his job as Miami’s defensive coordinator to take the Rutgers job. That was before Butch Davis left Miami for the Cleveland Browns. Had Schiano not bitten on the Rutgers carrot, he probably would either have been an NFL coordinator under Davis or, better yet, head coach at Miami.

With Schiano out of the mix, Hurricanes’ offensive coordinator Larry Coker got the job--and may be voted coach of the year.

Hurry Up Offense

This week’s numbers summary or, as we call it in the BCS back shop: paralysis by analysis. Here’s what happened while idle Oregon sat around and watched paint dry last weekend. The Ducks were jumped by Florida in the BCS standings and saw their BCS point total zoom from 11.97 to 13.22.

Oregon lost nearly a point in its computer component and watched its strength of schedule jump from 15 to 23. Texas, remaining at No. 6 despite its week off, also lost ground in the BCS, going from 13.51 to 14.39.

For more information on Oregon’s Rose Bowl chances, contact Joey Harrington in Eugene. No, seriously. The Heisman Trophy candidate has boned up on all the scenarios and is actually keeping Oregon coaches apprised. Oregon is rooting for archrival Washington to upset Miami this weekend and also wouldn’t mind at all if Colorado knocked off Nebraska on Friday in Boulder. Nebraska held firm as No. 1 in the BCS and No. 2 Miami’s 59-0 rout of Syracuse allowed the Hurricanes to separate themselves from No. 3 Oklahoma. Miami increased its lead from .58 to 2.88 points.

It has been assumed that Nebraska, Miami and Oklahoma control own destinies, but what if Oklahoma and Miami win out? Might one-loss Florida be able to jump Oklahoma for the No. 2 BCS spot?

Probably not, although Florida closed the gap on Oklahoma from 4.09 to 1.82 points. This may come down to a battle of quality-win points. Oklahoma, remember, has tentatively secured a point for beating Texas and will receive at least another full bonus point should it defeat Nebraska in the Big 12 title game. Florida has no quality victories and even a Dec. 1 victory against No. 7 Tennessee will only help marginally. Teams get bonus points based on their final BCS rankings. Those points are then deducted from the totals. For example, a Florida victory against Tennessee would knockthe Volunteers to No. 10 in the BCS standings and the Gators will pick up only .06.

Our best guess on the major BCS bowls: Rose: Miami-Nebraska; Fiesta: Oregon-Michigan; Sugar: Texas-Florida; Orange: Maryland-Illinois. Maryland and Oregon have secured BCS berths entering this week’s games. Maryland is Orange Bowl bound and Oregon is going to the Fiesta, unless the Ducks somehow make it to the Rose. Illinois will make a strong at-large case if it improves to 10-1 by beating Northwestern today. Illinois clinches the Big Ten’s automatic berth if it wins and Ohio State defeats Michigan on Saturday. Safe to say, the rebuilding project is complete for Illinois Coach Ron Turner, who inherited a team that finished 0-11 in 1997 under Lou Tepper.

Not much of a Heisman race, continued: The Rocky Mountain News’ weekly poll of 10 Heisman voters has Florida quarterback Rex Grossman picking up ground on Nebraska’s Crouch. Grossman, who threw four interceptions in Florida’s loss to Auburn, would become the first sophomore to win the award. Crouch is a superb runner but has thrown eight interceptions and seven touchdown passes. The News’ poll leaders, in order: Crouch, Grossman, Miami quarterback Ken Dorsey, Oregon’s Harrington and Oklahoma safety Roy Williams. Remember when running backs used to dominate this thing?