Jordan Needs to Air Out His Thinking

Wallace Matthews of the New York Post is considerably agitated that Michael Jordan is considering another comeback.

“OK, so now it’s [just about] official,” he writes, “Michael Jordan has no life. No life outside a basketball court, at least.

“[Soon] it will be confirmed that the man who could have it all wants nothing more than to bounce a basketball with men 10 and 15 years his junior.”

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More Jordan: Shaun Powell in Newsday: “[Jordan] is re-re-returning, and he might as well be Michael Jackson, a forty-something icon still moonwalking, tossing a black fedora across the stage and singing ‘Billie Jean.’ The first time was magical. The second?

“Well, the encore by Jordan makes you worry and wonder if the worst will happen.”

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Trivia time: Which teams played in the World Series in 1941, two months before America’s involvement in World War II?

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Redskin requiem: Tony Kornheiser of the Washington Post, on the Redskins losing to the Chargers: “Here’s the part about the San Diego game I can’t get out of my head: The Chargers won one game last year. One.

“They passed on Michael Vick and instead signed a 47-year-old, 5-foot-2 quarterback [Doug Flutie] who probably wanted to play in Southern California so he could be close enough to Disneyland to audition for the part of ‘Happy’ in ‘Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.’

“And they laid 30 points on the Redskins!”

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Winners are losers: Mike Bianchi of the Orlando (Fla.) Sentinel reacting to Tampa Bay’s unimpressive 10-6 win over the “dreadful” Dallas Cowboys: “Dallas owner Jerry Jones reportedly had a face lift during the off-season, but unfortunately his team is still drooping and sagging like Phyllis Diller’s neckline. Sadly, America’s team has become like America’s economy-fading into oblivion.

“There is no excuse for the Bucs, a team with Super Bowl intentions, to have to hold on at the end against this decrepit, dilapidated dynasty from another era.”

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No-hit park: Bud Geracie in the San Jose Mercury News: “Best place to see a no-hitter: Qualcomm Stadium, where the hometown Padres have been no-hit twice and used an eighth-inning bunt to break up a perfect game.”

* “Virginia Tech’s head athletic trainer is Mike Goforth, which is short for Shakeitoff.”

* “For Phil Mickelson, it’s the Wannamajor Trophy.”

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Ouch! NBA agent David Falk, ridiculing the Chicago Bulls’ general manager over the trade of Elton Brand: “Anybody who says Jerry Krause can’t build a team, I take issue with. I think he’s done an unbelievable job building the Clippers.”

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Looking back: On this date in 1965, UCLA lost its opening game to Michigan State, 13-3, at East Lansing, Mich.

The Bruins would avenge that defeat by beating the Spartans, 14-12, in the Rose Bowl game on Jan. 1, 1966.

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Trivia answer: The New York Yankees and Brooklyn Dodgers. The Yankees won in five games.

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And finally: C.W. Nevius of the San Francisco Chronicle is not disturbed that replacement officials were employed in opening NFL games: “None of it looked so horrible from this armchair.”