It’s the Loneliest Job in the World

William Gildea of the Washington Post, writing on the lonely life of an NFL punter: “Not only does a punter lack the renown that can come from playing celebrated positions like quarterback and middle linebacker, he works from adversity: Opponents can mount a ferocious charge against him, opponents’ fans try to incite his own demise, even his own team’s fans don’t like to see him come into the game because they are about to give up the ball.

“The punter is the team’s repairman. You hate needing him, but may feel better after he’s done his work.”

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Trivia time: Which NBA team holds the record for the best single-season winning percentage on the road?

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Part of the landscape: Rick Telander of the Chicago Sun-Times, commenting on the Winter Olympics: “Salt Lake City has been preparing for this event, it seems, since about the time Brigham Young walked with his flock over the Wasatch Mountains, saw the seagulls in the valley below and said: ‘Behold the future home of John Stockton and the Mailman.’”

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More Telander: “When I watch Mike Tyson, I often am reminded of actor Richard Pryor’s frantic words to an interviewer after he and Gene Wilder shot a prison film amid real prisoners in a real joint: ‘Thank God for penitentiaries.’”

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DQ action: An English bookmaker has taken more bets on Tyson being disqualified if he fights Lennox Lewis than for either heavyweight to win the fight.

Bookmaker William Hill cut the odds on a Tyson disqualification from 6-1 to 4-1. Hill has Lewis at 4-9 to win and Tyson at 13-8.

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Firing bonus: A week after being fired by the Buccaneers, Tony Dungy was named coach of the Colts, who will pay him about $1 million more a year than he made with Tampa Bay. He also inherits an offense led by Peyton Manning, Edgerrin James and Marvin Harrison.

“If this were a divorce,” said David Whitley of the Orlando Sentinel, “it was like being kicked out of the house by Leona Helmsley and having Jennifer Connelly pull up in a Ferrari and ask whether you want to go for a ride.”

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Dull dilemma: Thomas Johansson lamented that tennis in his native Sweden has faded in popularity, partly because the sport thrives on flamboyant personalities.

“Look at me, I’m not that interesting,” Johansson said. “If you color your hair red and you act a little bit different, then you’re interesting.”

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A slam dunk: Jon Gruden’s agent, Bob LaMonte, commenting on his client: “If there’s a zero-percent chance of Jon Gruden signing with the Raiders, it doesn’t take John Nash [subject of “A Beautiful Mind”] to figure out the probability.”

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Looking back: On this day in 1996, the Dallas Cowboys defeated the Pittsburgh Steelers, 27-17, in Super Bowl XXX in Tempe, Ariz.

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Trivia answer: The 1971-72 Lakers, .816 ( 31-7).

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And finally: Former NBA coach Alex Hannum, who died recently at the age of 78, also was the first coach of the Oakland Oaks in the American Basketball Assn.

He said of the ABA’s red, white and blue ball: “The only place for that thing is on the end of a seal’s nose.”

Mal Florence