A McEnroe of Squash? You Cannot Be Serious

Admit it, you haven’t thought about squash lately. Maybe squash for Thanksgiving and how to get reluctant family members to eat it. But, in all likelihood, not the sport.

If all squash players were as controversial as Canadian Jonathon Power, though, the game might easily pick up a larger following.

Joe O’Connor of Canada’s National Post newspaper conducted a question-and-answer interview with Power last week, asking the John McEnroe of squash whether he has misgivings about things he has said.

Power: “You mean other than, ‘Honey, you look fat in those jeans?’ Yeah, I’ve had a few. One time, I kind of pointed at the referee and said, ‘Somebody kill that guy.’ That was kind of harsh.”

*

Add Power trip: Apparently, fans in Boston treat him the way Wimbledon used to regard McEnroe in his playing days, at least before he used his rebel rep to his commercial benefit.

“I am anti-squash-establishment,” Power told O’Connor. “And the Harvard crowd represents everything I want to destroy. I think squash is a game everybody should be able to play, and it is in the rest of the world.

“The game is only elitist and Ivy League in North America -- more so in the States than [in Canada] -- and it drives me crazy.”

*

Trivia time: What event did Spiridon Louis win at the 1896 Olympics?

*

Courting Bobby: New York Post columnist Phil Mushnick on Bobby Knight’s lawsuit against Indiana University for wrongful dismissal: “Knight now asks a court to believe that he wasn’t canned for being a madman; that he just played one on TV. Even though he played himself. Lost income? He exploited for financial gain what he habitually denied -- his violent lunacy -- before and after he was fired.

“And if the TV commercials in which he appeared as a close-to-the-cliff raging lunatic are ruled admissible -- why shouldn’t they be? -- how can he claim that he was wrongfully sacked and lost income as a result of being mistaken as a misanthrope? He cashed in on that image, for crying out loud.”

*

Gary and Barry show: Seattle Times columnist Steve Kelley’s take on the blossoming SuperSonic backcourt partnership of Gary Payton and Brent Barry: “It takes a special person to play with Payton. It takes a player whose ego isn’t as large as the Staples Center. It takes a two-guard who doesn’t need the ball in his hands all of the time. Paul Pierce couldn’t play with Payton. Neither could Kobe or Iverson.”

*

Naked ambition: The recent nude poses by three female Romanian gymnasts in a Japanese news magazine drew criticism from sports officials.

“Everyone has a free will, but I believe they have stained the image of the country,” Adrian Stoica, secretary of the country’s gymnastics federation, told the daily newspaper Libertatea.

*

Trivia answer: The marathon.

*

And finally: Colorado treasurer Judy Van Gorden, on a $41,000 trust fund for Ralphie, the University of Colorado’s buffalo mascot:

“This will provide growing support for Ralphie in perpetuity -- not only for this Ralphie but all future Ralphies.”

*

-- Lisa Dillman