Giving Thanks to Burk

Thank you, Martha Burk. Speaking for the golf-watching public, we didn’t think we could enjoy the Masters any more than we did last year -- the first year that all 18 holes were televised. But then you came along, Martha, and thanks to you we’ll get to watch the Masters without any commercial interruption.

Augusta National yanked all commercials in order to protect its longtime sponsors from any embarrassment at having to choose between the “tuhnament” (as folks tend to say down there) and Weekend At Martha’s! And we get: All 18. No commercials. How great is that.

It’s like PBS without the stupid Pledge Week.

So can I get you anything, Martha? A pecan roll? A souvenir azalea? A green-and-gold Masters hat to keep the hot Georgia sun off your head while you’re picketing somewhere out beyond the livestock?

When Masters TV coverage starts today -- with the azaleas ushering in The Official Start of Spring -- you won’t see Martha Burk at all. Tom Caraccioli, a spokesman for USA Network, which will telecast the first two days of the tournament, said, “We are broadcasting the golf tournament, period.”

And you can’t really believe CBS Sports, which has been in bed with Augusta National for 300 years, will give her a smooch on the weekend, can you? The only way Martha Burk will get on CBS is if she streaks naked down the 15th fairway.

Tony Kornheiser

Washington Post

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Conference Call Disconnected

In previous years, CBS Sports would have a conference call with writers to promote its broadcast of the Masters. Jim Nantz would recall Masters past, David Feherty would display his wit, Gary McCord would analyze Phil Mickelson’s chances. And the questions about Tiger Woods, the biggest ratings-grabber in sports, would be plentiful.

This year, there also would be inquiries about CBS’ coverage of the off-site protests and other news that may occur during the week at Augusta.

CBS has ducked those questions since last year. Why not keep avoiding this deepest of sand traps? So, there’s no conference call scheduled this week, and CBS apparently has no plans to publicly acknowledge that anything is amiss unless some activist leaps into Rae’s Creek with a seven-iron and a slogan.

Steve Zipay

Newsday

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See No Martha, Hear No Martha

It’s hard to imagine if there were a big, messy issue in pro football that CBS’ “NFL Today” show would ignore it.

CBS hasn’t shied away from scandals in college basketball. They are as much a part of the game as three-pointers.

CBS, though, is expected to take a different approach during its coverage of the Masters. Faced with the biggest controversy ever to hit golf, the network will counter with pictures of azaleas, magnolia trees and the numbing Masters theme music.

It probably will be: See no Martha Burk, hear no Martha Burk.

Ed Sherman

Chicago Tribune