Title Won Strictly by the Numbers

To say this has been a wacky Laker season is an understatement. So how did they win the Pacific Division?

Here’s how Shaquille O’Neal explained it to Suzy Shuster in an interview for NBA TV:

“We just did it in a different way,” he said. “When you think of four, most people think two plus two. But we did it three plus one, or five minus one, which still gets you four, if you understand my analogy.”

Said Shuster: “Calculus professors everywhere are saying, ‘Huh?’ ”

And then this: Marge Hearn, a guest of the “Loose Cannons” on XTRA, was asked by Mychal Thompson what Chick would have thought about all the Laker turmoil this season and how he would have handled it.

“I think he’d have probably been fired,” Marge said.

Old joke, new twist: From syndicated columnist Norman Chad: “Q: How many Lakers does it take to change a light bulb? A: None. They’d rather sit in the dark so they can’t see each other.”

Trivia time: During Hollywood Park’s first season in 1938, Air Chute won the Premiere Handicap, which had a purse of only $2,930. Who owned Air Chute? (Hint: The winning purse mattered little to this man.)

It wasn’t a kidney: A topic in Wednesday’s Morning Briefing was dumb questions asked by sports talk show hosts. Well, sportswriters can ask dumb questions too.

Reader Andy Nagle of Long Beach recalls that after Mickey Mantle had a liver transplant, the surgeon was asked during a news conference whether the liver donor was still alive.

“You’re a sportswriter, aren’t you?” the surgeon replied.

Wait a minute: Julius Erving may have gotten a little ahead of himself when, on NBA TV, he congratulated LeBron James, 19, for his rookie-of-the-year honor by saying, “I think this award is the first step in going to the Hall of Fame.”

The expert: “The Florida Legislature just turned down a $60-million subsidy to help the Marlins build a new stadium,” said Channel 9’s Alan Massengale. “Perhaps the Marlins should call Dodger owner Frank McCourt for advice on how to get a big fat loan.”

Big news: Even when George Steinbrenner doesn’t talk, it makes headlines in New York. “Mt. Streinbrenner Quiet ... for Now,” read a headline in Wednesday’s New York Post. The news was that Steinbrenner declined to comment about the Yankees losing three out of four to the Boston Red Sox.

Trivia answer: William E. Boeing, the retired airplane magnate.

And finally: After recording his 7,000th career victory in the 2001 Khaled Stakes at Hollywood Park, jockey Chris McCarron said of his winning mount: “This horse is a fighter.” Which proves sometimes names can be misleading. The horse was Spinelessjellyfish, who, at 8 years old, will be running in Saturday’s $150,000 Tiznow Stakes at Hollywood Park.

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Larry Stewart can be reached at larry.stewart@latimes.com.