Hetero drinkalotus

As much as I’d like to be the snobbish, unemployed writer who lashes out at Samantha Bonar with aggression built up in her little dungeon of subdued envy, I must say I can’t.

She has my dream job, and she’s good at it. In fact, my coworker and I have decided that you are our favorite columnist at The Times.

“Gorillas in Our Midst” [Nov. 18] was fantastic! We were just talking about the curious ape-like mating habits of human beings! Please, keep up the good work, Samantha, and have a few drinks this weekend in celebration of your appreciative readers.

Charli Schuler

Pasadena