When stars’ ‘Own Words’ are used against them

“Celebrity Autobiography: In Their Own Words,” which premieres Thursday night on Bravo, is a one-hour special in which comic actors read passages from the memoirs of the likes of Sylvester Stallone, Zsa Zsa Gabor, Mr. T, Vanna White, ‘N Sync and Burt Reynolds (intercut with ex-wife Loni Anderson). Object: hilarity.

Based on a local live show that ran for years in the bar above the now defunct Farfalla on La Brea Avenue, it’s the sort of thing that might be great fun in a crowd, with an Appletini or even a festive Shirley Temple on the table in front of you, but in this incarnation -- even though it’s shot cabaret-style before a live audience -- it is never more than mildly amusing, and at times tiresome.

The premise seems promising, but perhaps it’s not as promising as all that. Given that this is the product of long preparation, this may be as good as it can get. Co-creator-performer Eugene Pack and company highlight the frequent absurdities of such tomes, in which trivialities are often elevated into major events, and odd notions presented as insights. But just because a thing is absurd does not make it funny.

It’s not as if the cast isn’t talented; any hour of television that includes Fred Willard, Cheryl Hines, Doris Roberts, Jay Mohr, Andrea Martin, Laraine Newman, Kel Mitchell and Kevin Nealon can count itself lucky indeed. For the most part, the performers use a neutral delivery -- mugging is largely avoided -- yet from the start the enterprise is awash in unavoidable ironical knowingness. The humor depends on our feeling that we’re smarter than the celebrity scribes -- or at least smart enough to keep our mouths shut.

And yet in our zillion-blog world, celebrities are not the only people telling more than the world needs to know, in less than perfect prose. Certainly I could live my life happily not knowing that Kathie Lee Gifford’s child Cody was conceived on “a five-day cruise off the French and Italian rivieras in early July” or the explicit details of David Cassidy’s “semi-aborted sexual experience” with “Partridge Family” costar Susan Dey. But my own reaction was sympathy for the lampooned, who are, after all, being taken out of context. We hear Hines as Anderson say, “The wedding was a total blast. Jim Nabors sang ‘Our Love Is Here to Stay,’ ” and the laugh depends on her saying no more than that. But presumably this was not all she wrote.

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‘Celebrity Autobiography: In Their Own Words’

Where: Bravo

When: 10 to 11 p.m. Thursday

Ratings: TV-14 (may be unsuitable for children under the age of 14).

Eugene Pack...Himself

Fred Willard...Himself

Cheryl Hines...Herself

Kevin Nealon...Himself

Doris Roberts...Herself

Andrea Martin...Herself

Julie Brown...Herself

Laraine Newman...Herself

Jay Mohr...Himself

Executive producers: Eugene Pack, Troy Miller, Evan Weiss and Dale Rehfeld. Creator: Eugene Pack.