Full-Court Pressure

At this point, I guess it’s safe to say the Lakers’ rosy scenario is dead.

That was the one in which they thought they could trade Shaquille O’Neal for some good young players, bring in a top coach, reenact Showtime and become an exciting, 50-win team.

Hey, we’re the Lakers, what could go wrong?

The coach, until Wednesday, was Rudy Tomjanovich and there was only one problem:

The whole thing was a hallucination.

You don’t just hop off one dynasty and onto the next one. What they have doesn’t look like the nucleus of their next super-power.

Rebuilding, the word they won’t say -- Tomjanovich called it “the R word” -- won’t be painless or fast. Success isn’t inevitable, even for the Lakers, coming off 20 mostly fat years so that no one can remember it any other way.

The Lakers didn’t pressure Tomjanovich to leave and were shocked when he did. There was no problem between Tomjanovich and Kobe Bryant. The media weren’t hard on Tomjanovich.

The monster that is Laker tradition gobbled him up and in the post-O’Neal era, there may be more after Tomjanovich. He said he never read a newspaper or watched TV, but around here, you can breathe the expectations in the air.

“This isn’t Houston, where Rudy was the fair-haired boy,” says a friend. “He was overwhelmed and he said, ‘Who needs it?’ ”

Here’s the problem in a nutshell:

After a lackluster half-season, at least, in comparison with the good old days when they didn’t win much more but were very entertaining, everyone was ready for a change.

The report Tomjanovich might resign was met with, first, shock, and second, widespread joy, as everyone began speculating about Phil Jackson returning to save the day once more.

Of course, Jackson might not come. In the really bad news, he’d have trouble winning 45 games with the schedule crunch they’re facing too. (Oh, and he wouldn’t reenact Showtime, either; he’d bring back the triangle.)

Jackson would definitely help. He’d bring a sense of direction. No matter what happened, when people got done talking to him every night, they’d go away thinking everything was OK.

Nevertheless, Jackson has already saved the day here once and doesn’t seem eager to prove he can do it again without O’Neal.

Jackson still has a place at the beach and a relationship with Jeanie Buss, but I still can’t see him saying, “Well, as long as I’m going to be there a lot, I may as well coach the Lakers.”

In any case, we won’t know for a couple of days, because Jackson’s on an island off the west coast of Australia, catching lobsters, and out of cellular range.

No, really. The Lakers are hanging on to a playoff berth by their fingernails, about to go on the trip from hell, without Bryant, and the guy everyone’s praying for is pulling up lobster pots in the Indian Ocean.

Now, as to the Lakers’ problem....

Here’s a test:

If you think it was Tomjanovich’s offense, his substitution pattern, Jerry West’s departure or Mitch Kupchak’s draft choices, congratulations! You’re in denial!

There is one and only one problem: They traded O’Neal, and now they’re in transition to whatever comes next, and, so far, it could be looking better.

The problem isn’t whom Tomjanovich had on the floor, or whom Kupchak took at No. 27 (his lowest pick in four years on the job was a No. 20), it’s the team, stupid!

Nothing against Chucky Atkins, Chris Mihm, Caron Butler, Jumaine Jones, Brian Cook, Tierre Brown et al., who have been great, but they’re following eight years of O’Neal and Bryant.

Nor will it be easy to get better soon.

Why won’t they make some trades?

I’m sorry, you’re still in denial, unless someone gives them a star for some of their role players. This happens less in real life than on talk radio.

How about free agency?

Wrong again. They can’t sign free agents until 2007 or 2008 because they don’t have cap room.

OK, how did last summer’s moves work out?

Not the way they had hoped. Lamar Odom not only isn’t quite what they had hoped he’d be playing alongside Bryant, he isn’t quite what they had hoped he’d be when Kobe isn’t there.

The Miami Package they got for O’Neal (Odom, Butler and Brian Grant) is averaging only three points a game more than the Boston Package they got for Gary Payton (Atkins, Mihm and Jones.)

Nevertheless, the Lakers were so excited at this season’s prospects, they gave Tomjanovich a monster five-year, $30-million deal. That’s as much as they paid Jackson and the second-highest salary ever for an NBA coach.

But who am I to rain on everyone’s parade?

Seriously. Hey, as long as we’re going back to the future, why not call the Heat people and see if they’ll take Odom, Butler and Grant for O’Neal!

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We hardly knew him

Time of service as Los Angeles Laker head coach, from shortest to longest (Years are start of season):

*--* YEAR COACH LENGTH 1979 JACK McKINNEY 13 games 1993 MAGIC JOHNSON 16 games 1998 KURT RAMBIS 37 games 2004 RUDY TOMJANOVICH 43 games 1992-93 RANDY PFUND 1 season, 64 games 1979-81 PAUL WESTHEAD 1 season, 70 games 1967-68 BILL VAN BREDA KOLFF 2 seasons 1969-70 JOE MULLANEY 2 seasons 1990-91 MIKE DUNLEAVY 2 seasons 1976-78 JERRY WEST 3 seasons 1994-98 DEL HARRIS 4 seasons, 12 games 1971-75 BILL SHARMAN 5 seasons 1999-03 PHIL JACKSON 5 seasons 1960-66 FRED SCHAUS 7 seasons 1981-89 PAT RILEY 8 seasons, 71 games

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Note: Bill Bertka was 2-1 in two stints as interim coach