Vitale makes waves with Gators gaffe

College basketball’s “real” season is upon us -- conference tournaments followed by the NCAA tournament -- and, lo and behold, Dick Vitale has opened his mouth.

Vitale was enjoying a meal at a restaurant when a Tennessee radio station reached him for a quick interview. Vitale ended up munching on some filet of sole, as in the high-priced sneaker variety.

Asked about Florida’s recent loss to Louisiana State, Vitale proceeded to reveal private comments Florida Coach Billy Donovan supposedly made comparing his forwards, Joakim Noah and Al Horford.

“Billy Donovan grabbed me all alone and said the pro scouts are making a mistake. He said there’s no way I would take Noah over -- he said he would never say that publicly -- over Horford,” Vitale said.

Apparently, the definition of “publicly” escaped Vitale, though he grasped its meaning quickly after receiving a phone call about his comments. Vitale called the radio show back and said the conversation with Donovan never happened and that he was only joking.

“This is a non-story,” Vitale told the show’s hosts. “It’s absurd.”

And if there is one thing Dickie V. knows, it’s the absurd.

Trivia time

What state has played host to the most NCAA Final Fours in Division I men’s basketball?

The Big Lame

Seems those familiar with the California-Stanford rivalry were a little perplexed at the NFL’s plan to trademark “the Big Game” for Super Bowl use. Funny, the Cal-Stanford football game was coined “the Big Game” in 1902, 20 years before the idea for the NFL was hatched.

Never mind, there are plenty of other phrases for the NFL to claim:

* “Just say no” -- Something for the Detroit Lions’ Matt Millen to consider the next time he’s asked to make a draft pick.

* “Just do it” -- Advice for Chicago Bears Coach Lovie Smith to heed the next time he contemplates changing quarterbacks in a Super Bowl.

* “Just win, baby” -- Al Davis has to forfeit all rights, as all his Oakland Raiders seem to do is just lose.

Hoof-in-mouth disease

Vitale wasn’t the only basketball analyst making a meal out of his foot this week. Cedric “Cornbread” Maxwell, the Boston Celtics’ radio analyst, said a mouthful recently when slamming Violet Palmer, one of the NBA’s female referees, saying she should “go back to the kitchen.”

Maxwell, angry about Palmer’s calls during a recent game, suggested she “go in there and make me some bacon and eggs, would you?”

Now either Maxwell wanted something to eat with his cornbread or he has a problem with female referees. But even Maxwell seemed unclear whether he crossed an out-of-bounds line.

“If I said anything that might have been insensitive or sexist in any way, then I apologize because she worked extremely hard to get where she is now, end of quote,” Maxwell said.

An apology straight from the heart.

Wake up the echoes ...

Notre Dame’s Blue-Gold spring game will feature Ara Parseghian and Lou Holtz as coaches.

“Of course, it will be a privilege to come back on the field again, which I hadn’t been on since 1974,” Parseghian told the Observer, a college media publication.

Still, the presence of Parseghian and Holtz will be a novelty: Notre Dame coaches who actually won bowl games. None of the last three Irish coaches can claim that.

Trivia answer

Missouri with 13 (10 in Kansas City, three in St. Louis).

Footnote: No Division I team from Missouri has made it to a Final Four.

In fact, the furthest Missouri or St. Louis has gone is the Elite Eight.

Heck, even Cal State Fullerton has made the Elite Eight.

And finally

University of Virginia officials were unhappy to find that the athletic logo of rival Virginia Tech was carved into the Cavaliers’ hardwood court at John Paul Jones Arena. Virginia beat Virginia Tech Thursday. Meanwhile, university officials are still investigating.

Rumor is the culprits ‘fessed up to Vitale. But just try to pry a private conversation out of that guy.

*

chris.foster@latimes.com