‘Hell’s Kitchen,’ ‘MasterChef’ recaps: Donning the black jackets

What are we going to do without Brian Merel on “Hell’s Kitchen”? Who will provide comic relief? His time was no doubt running out after his wiseacre comment to chef Gordon Ramsay, who had given him a piece of burnt catfish and ordered him to taste it.

“Tastes like fish,” Brian said.

Wrong answer, buddy. The right answer would have been more along the lines of, “Tastes like catfish that I burnt, chef, and I will happily accept the death penalty for my culinary transgression.”

Brian was on the chopping block Tuesday night along with Robyn Almodovar, and after her crybaby performance in the kitchen it’s hard to imagine why she was asked to stick around for another dinner service. All that was missing was the flailing of the legs. She was already swinging her arms every which way trying to blame everyone but herself when she was caught putting garnishes in a hot oven to keep them at the ready instead of preparing them fresh to order.

There’s no way Robyn can handle the job of helping run Gordon Ramsay Steak. And Brian probably can’t either. But if I had to give the keys to the kitchen to one of them, it would be Brian. Now, we will have to rely on Robyn for laughs. But we’ll be laughing at her, not her comic asides. Such as when she got caught snickering at Justin Antiori, who had gotten caught doing the same thing she did (only he kept cooked fish waiting around for the next dinner service, not garnish.) Good rule of thumb: Never crack a smile in “Hell’s Kitchen.”

Over on “MasterChef,” we learn once again that an advantage is rarely that.

The home chefs were asked to make a “stunning” dish using Santa Barbara spot prawns. That were still alive. Shrieks followed. Monti Carlo kept calling chef Ramsay “Dude.” That has to be a first, no? David Martinez shocked everyone with a first-place finish, which gave him an incredible advantage. He chose the ingredient to use in the following challenge: corn. The twist? The competitors would have to make a dessert dish. The advantage? The judges gave David three examples of how he could use corn in a dessert, including a rice pudding.

David, smelling victory, declares: “David Martinez is not a joke.”

That moment is followed second later by David admitting that he forgot to get rice from the pantry for his rice pudding dish. Cue the nation’s laughter.

Becky Reams earns bonus point in my eyes for agreeing to help David by giving him rice. The way she sees it, it’s a no-lose situation. She comes off as gracious, and there’s simply no way David is going to outcook her, rice or no rice. No surprise, she soars while David’s rice dish is an inedible disaster.

Becky may be grating and annoying, but, wow, can she cook and plate a dish. It seems more and more like she is the one to beat.

I had Felix Fang of Hollywood pegged to be among the last ones standing. That ride came to a halt Tuesday night, when her dish fell flat. And then there were six.

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