Op-Ed: A way of thinking about Israel that isn’t helpful and may even be dangerous

With the rockets coming out of Gaza, my inbox overflowed in recent days with requests, even demands, to donate money, write letters and attend rallies showing my “support for,” “loyalty to” and, especially, “love of” Israel.

There are things in this world that I do love. But Israel is not one of them. I don’t “not love” Israel. I just think it’s a pointless, and perhaps even dangerous, word.

My kids attended a Hebrew-language camp, spent chunks of high school and college in Israel and visit frequently. My wife just returned from taking 60 adolescents to a high school outside Jerusalem where they’ll spend a semester, and where she is vice principal. I took some 20 congregational groups to Israel, and I’m headed back next February with a couple of dozen youngsters from northern New Jersey.

Israel is a huge part of my life because, as a Jew, that’s how it’s supposed to be. But do I love Israel?

The Hasbara Fellowships, which train Israel advocates on campus, offer “Ten Reasons Why I Love Israel.” They include food, scenery and the “start-up nation” reputation, which has made Israel a tech giant. I like the food, the scenery is gorgeous, and Israel’s tech prowess is indeed impressive. But these are reasons to love?

More sober usage comes from the Haredim, the very traditional Jews who see Israel as the modern incarnation of God’s will, which is at least serious and consistent, as these are the folks intent on building ever more settlements on the West Bank to fulfill God’s promise.

The Israel they love has gotten a boost during the Netanyahu years, and may get even more of one in the next government, whose ruling coalition will likely have right-wing extremists like we’ve never seen before: the Kahanists, who don’t believe in rights for non-Jewish Israelis and have emboldened violence toward Arabs and gays.

Theirs is an Israel I would find difficult to love.

Similarly, evangelical Christians love Israel — they really love Israel. Their money and influence outweigh the fabled “Jewish lobby.” But the Israel they love is the one that will herald the second coming of Jesus; in the words of Israeli historian Anita Shapira, they are imbued with “the idea of the Jews returning to their ancient homeland as the first step to world redemption.”

This is an Israel I am supposed to love?

I am an American, born and raised here, and as such I am obligated to cheer what I admire, criticize what I don’t, serve if needed and participate in American civil society knowing that what’s best for us as a people may not always be best for me as an individual. That’s fine. My responsibility is not to “love” the U.S.; it’s to be a citizen.

Same thing with Israel.

Many argue that Israel has no choice but to use force to rout Hamas from Gaza. I agree Hamas is an evil terrorist organization; I spent much of an early major rocket attack — the debut of Iron Dome — in a mamad (safe room) at Kibbutz Erez, on the Gaza border. But the furthest many will go in assigning some responsibility to Israel for the current situation is, as one pundit put it, to say that Israel made “miscalculations” along the way. The blockade of Gaza, the passing of the Nation-State law, the relentless growth of the settlements, the evictions from Sheikh Jarra and other Arab neighborhoods — did these not play a role?

The “Israel can do no wrong” mentality so prevalent today scares me because it is not in Israel’s best interest. It is based on half-truths, accentuating the positive, rewriting or playing down the negative. Israel is not a mythical place. It is an actual flesh-and-blood country — which is how we Jews must see it: a real place, sometimes glamorous, sometimes anything but.

A new Pew Research Center study and a recent UCLA study underscore what is already widely known: More young Jews feel ever less connected to Israel. Much of that is because, on the one hand, they see morally questionable actions by Israel — the occupation being the big one — while on the other, they are told they must idealize, honor and, yes, love Israel. With such cognitive dissonance, can we blame them for seeking refuge in apathy?

I raised my children to know Israel. They speak the language, they know the history; in Israel, they are at home. Israel’s role in their lives, the opinions they develop, the policies they promote or decry — that’s all up to them. We agree on much; we may disagree on even more. But the only way they could disappoint me is by not caring at all.

Clifford M. Kulwin is rabbi emeritus of Temple B’nai Abraham in Livingston, N.J.