Sideline Chatter: While Berra might have died, the Yogisms will live on and on

Yogi Berra was smarter than the average catcher, too.

Upon Berra’s death last week at age 90, Reds Hall of Famer Johnny Bench tweeted an image of the congratulatory telegram Berra sent him on July 16, 1980 after Bench hit his 314th career home run to break Yogi’s record for homers by a catcher.

It read: “Congratulations on breaking my home-run record last night. I always thought the record would stand until it was broken.”

NFL headlines

At SportsPickle.com: “Cowboys confident Brandon Weeden will suddenly and inexplicably not be terrible at football.”

At TheOnion.com: “Wild-eyed Jim Harbaugh informs players they must kill their pregame meal.”

Five for the ages

Don Pellmann, 100, broke world age-group records in five disparate events at the San Diego Senior Olympics the 100-meter dash, high jump, long jump, shot put and discus.

Or as the feat is known in the over-90 division, the prunetathlon.

This spells trouble

Tottenham Hotspur officials apologized to hockey icon Wayne Gretzky after presenting him with a jersey with “Gretsky” on the back.

Veteran Hotspur watchers declared it the team’s biggest blunder since manager Ted Lasso.

Bonus baby

A woman gave birth at San Diego’s Petco Park during last Thursday’s Giants-Padres game.

No word on whether the pitching coaches helped her with her delivery.

Waiving the penalty

An 18-year-old Czech model allegedly tried to extort $2,000 from hockey star Jaromir Jagr, threatening to release a picture of them in bed.

“Jagr reportedly replied that he didn’t care if the picture got out,” reported Ian Hamilton of the Regina (Saskatchewan) Leader-Post, “so he didn’t get an assist on her goal.”

Foul scheduling

Officials of Scotland’s Celtic soccer team, responding to complaints of bad body odor in the stands, sent a letter to several fans urging them to bathe before attending home games.

Hey, it’s either that or schedule more games with FC Cologne.

Talko time

Mariners first baseman Logan Morrison, to The Times, on watching the nurses swaddle his newborn daughter: “The whole wrapping them up is crazy ... It’s like tighter than a Chipotle burrito.”

Comedy writer Jerry Perisho, on the woman giving birth at Petco Park: “Fans didn’t have to spank the baby to get him to cry. They simply informed him the Padres were nine games under .500.”

Times reader Bill Littlejohn, on the parents naming their ballpark baby Levi: “So if he’d been born at Levi’s Stadium at a 49er game, would they have named him Petco?”

Cowboys owner Jerry Jones, to The Dallas Morning News, when asked how he felt when QB Tony Romo broke a clavicle: “About as low as a crippled cricket’s ass.”

Pope 3, Colts 1

He landed in Havana, he landed in D.C., he landed in New York.

In other words, even Pope Francis registered more touchdowns than the Colts did last week.

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