EXHIBITORS AT SHO-WEST SAY ‘SHOW ME’

The theme of the 1986 ShoWest, a theater operators convention being held at the MGM Grand Hotel, is “If I were an exhibitor . . . Seeing ourselves as others see us.” Sort of like a dog wearing a “kick me” sign, it is a potentially self-abusive gesture to invite people from the fringes of your business to tell you how they would do your job better.

They even paid some of their guests to set them straight. Film critics Gene Siskel and Roger Ebert, who share the popular syndicated TV show “At the Movies,” were flown in from Chicago just to critique the modern concession stand.

Siskel and Ebert pulled no punches.

Siskel the tall, balding one, is against shaved ice in soft drinks and for a return of Black Crows (now called Licorice Crows) to the candy case.

Ebert, the rotund one who said he makes his own sweet and sour cuisine during movies by simultaneously munching popcorn and Sugar Babies, wants his popcorn fresh and his butter real.

Siskel and Ebert actually went beyond the concession stand, and despite a mock hostile repartee that kept the audience roaring with laughter, their criticisms best represented the victims of bad exhibition--the moviegoers.

They mentioned most of the things that drive all of us crazy--sticky floors, bad projection, the non-enforcement of no-talking and no-smoking rules--and they offered a couple of fresh suggestions.

From Siskel: Sell tickets in advance and post “Sold Out” signs so people won’t be made to stand in line for nothing. (It’s not for nothing, of course. In the multiplexes, the exhibitors hope you will buy a ticket to a less popular movie.)

From Ebert: Show more coming attractions and bring back short subjects.

Those were swift kicks with kid slippers, but at least they were kicks. Most of the expert pretenders who appeared on a subsequent panel--a group of nine men from such professions as marketing, producing, publicity and banking--delivered messages that basically explained what they, as exhibitors faced with the dreaded onslaught of the VCR, would do to make more money.

What could exhibitors have expected from the president of Pepsi-Cola USA, the suggestion that they offer patrons raw unfiltered apple juice?

No, they got what they deserved, a speech extolling the kind of “leadership marketing” that now has the average American drinking more soft drinks per year than water.

This is good news? Only to an exhibitor, whose soft drink sales can represent as much as 50% of net income. And to dentists, of course.

The most relevant--as well as the most eloquently delivered--speech on this subject came from 77-year-old actor Don Ameche, whose last two movies, “Trading Places” and “Cocoon,” have been huge income producers for the exhibitors.

Ameche said the cleaning up and upgrading of theaters seemed a relatively easy thing to him. The difficulty, as it is in many other American industries, is the inability for creative, long-term thinking.

Ameche hinted at a parallel between the American film and auto industries.

Detroit, faced with an invasion of lower-priced imports, continued to think short-term and lost a major share of the market. Hollywood, faced with an invasion of home-entertainment equipment, is making the same mistake.

The point was driven home by film maker and special-effects expert Douglas Trumbull, who reminded the exhibitors that the major studios, upon whom they depend primarily for product, are not spending a dime on research and development while the TV and home-video industries are spending millions “trying to wipe you out.”

Quality is the ultimate defense against stay-at-home moviegoing, and it is in the theaters where consumers will make that judgment. But after listening to others tell them what they do wrong for a day, the exhibitors weren’t willing to accept all of the blame.

“We have heard all of these things before,” said Morris Schulman, who operates 22 screens in Texas. “When you get right down to it, it doesn’t seem to make much difference how much you spend in your theater.

“You can put in $500 seats and people won’t sit in them to watch a bad movie. If you’ve got a good movie, they’ll sit in folding chairs. We need more good movies.”