Surrogate Mother Extols ‘Joy of Life’ in Novel Experience

When Beth Scholten mailed her Christmas cards this year, one was particularly poignant. The greeting was to a 1-year-old boy she gave birth to, but whom she will not raise as her son.

Scholten, 28, is a surrogate mother.

“I think of him as the son of a friend of our family, but one who I’m more interested in . . . ,” said Scholten of the child she bore Dec. 20, 1985, for an infertile woman who lives in another state.

Scholten, who lives in Newhall with her machinist-husband, Jack, 29, and their three children, said she first considered becoming a surrogate eight years ago when a girlfriend was having a difficult pregnancy. But it was not until she spotted a classified advertisement in August, 1984, that she seriously discussed the idea with her husband.

The ad had been placed by lawyer William Handel, 35, director of the Center for Surrogate Parenting in Beverly Hills. At the center, which is reportedly one of four in the nation, adopting couples pay $30,000 ($10,000 of which goes to the surrogate mother) for another woman to be artificially inseminated with the adopting husband’s sperm. Handel estimates he arranges 30 such procedures each year, half of them for California couples.

Couple Evaluated

Like other prospective surrogates and their husbands, Beth and Jack were screened and evaluated by a psychologist at the center. The surrogate screening process consists of interviews with the attorney, surrogate support group meetings, a thorough medical screening and psychological tests that include a separation-anxiety test. Nineteen out of 20 women who apply to become surrogates are rejected by the center, according to Handel.

Scholten’s decision was accepted easily by her family and close friends, she said. Nor did the decision pose problems for her at the Burbank Faith Church of the Nazarene, which her family attends. “I talked to my pastor. The church was very supportive,” she said.

Jack, who had to sign a contract agreeing to refrain from sexual intercourse with his wife until the artificial insemination was successful, also supported her decision. “She just wanted to give another couple the joy of life we’ve had with our children,” he said.

The adopting couple was with Beth and Jack Scholten in the delivery room at the Buenaventura Medical Clinic birthing center in Ventura. Jack photographed the event for a photo album that is in his and Beth’s bedroom. After the baby was born, his adoptive father cut the cord. Scholten had arranged for the baby to be presented first to the adoptive mother. Shortly afterward, the child was placed on Scholten’s stomach.

Suffers Ovarian Disorder

The 42-year-old adopting mother, who requested anonymity, is a professional woman who suffers from a rare ovarian disorder that causes infertility. “It was a very emotional moment,” she recalled. “I was crying and my husband was very happy. He was our son from the moment he was born. He was always our son. . . .

“When I got off the plane with that baby in my arms on Christmas Eve last year, I was crying all the way home because it was such a wonderful thing.”

Although there have been 400 to 500 reported births by surrogate mothers in the United States and the use of surrogates is increasing, no state has laws specifically governing surrogate parenting. In California, courts have generally fallen back on adoption law when dealing with surrogates.

Attorney Handel calls state law “archaic” when applied to a surrogate adoption. According to Handel, California Civil Code Section 7005 of the Uniform Parentage Act of 1964 recognizes the biological father in such cases merely as a “sperm donor” who later must adopt his own child, according to Handel. Until that happens, the surrogate’s husband is viewed legally as the father and her children as half brothers and half sisters.

For example, it took nearly one year for final adoption papers to be signed giving custody of Beth Scholten’s baby to the child’s father, a geologist.

Efforts are under way in 18 states to introduce legislation that would clearly define the rights of all parties involved.

In December, Beth Scholten, five other Southern California women and Handel held a press conference in Hollywood to announce formation of the National Assn. of Surrogate Mothers, an organization that will lobby for legislation and increased public awareness about surrogate parenting as an adoption alternative.

Scholten, Handel and the adoptive mother believe that the New Jersey Superior Court case of surrogate Mary Beth Whitehead points up the need for state laws. Despite signing a contract giving up her baby, Whitehead decided she wanted to keep the child. The Whitehead case is one of the first in the country in which a court has been asked to rule on the validity of a contract between a surrogate mother and an adopting couple in which the man is the sperm donor. In mid-November, Judge Harvey R. Sorkow continued the case until Monday.

The couple adopting Scholten’s baby said they had researched the issue, met with counselors and made countless inquiries over several years before going to the Center for Surrogate Parenting. Although they first felt awkward, their fears dissipated quickly.

“It was just so weird to us to be speaking to someone who would be having our baby for us,” the adoptive mother said. “It was strange to overcome the psychological hurdles of adjusting to that sort of thing.”

Of Beth, she said, “We love her. Nobody can say to me that she was in this for the money. She is such an empathetic and giving person.”

The adoptive mother plans to tell her son who his birth mother is when he is mature enough to comprehend. The two families exchange pictures and the Scholten family keeps a scrapbook, but they have not decided if they will visit each other someday.

“We have to talk to other adopting couples who are farther along than we are,” said the adoptive mother. “We are sort of in the pioneering class, before people have done studies on the effects on children.”

Studies Called Premature

Center psychologist Hilary Hanafin believes it is premature to begin studies of adopted children born to surrogate mothers but is conducting the center’s first follow-up surveys of the surrogates’ “original” children and the adoptive parents’ responses to parenthood.

She advocates that such parents tell the adopted child the truth at appropriate developmental stages, starting at age 3. “Present the child with a positive and joyful story that demonstrates how special the arrangement was,” she said.

Hanafin predicts that the child’s classmates may handle the truth easier than the classmates’ parents.

“It’s the adults who have conceptions of how families can be formed,” she said. “The negative feelings will probably come from the adults rather than the classmates, who have no particular preconceived notions.

“But when they get to be adolescents, it might be another story.”

Jack Scholten said that he and his wife told their children early in her pregnancy that the adopting couple could not have children and that “Mommy was going to have a baby for them. They had no problem at all with it. I was surprised at how easygoing they were.”

If the Scholtens had any doubts at first, they were erased when they met the adopting parents. “We just fell in love with them,” Beth said. “We decided, ‘This is terrific. Let’s do it.’ ”