Kerfeld’s Opinions Cover Everything, Including Himself

Charlie Kerfeld, clown prince of the Houston bullpen, promises to be as quotable in 1987 as he was as a rookie last year. He came up with the following for Patrick Reusse of the St. Paul Pioneer Press:

On his personality: “A lot of coaches along the way had a hard time dealing with it. They had the feeling I thought I was better than everyone else. They were right. I do think I’m better than everyone else.”

On New York Met fans last year: “I said they were hairy, vulgar, had beer breath and black teeth. Then, I said, ‘I haven’t even started talking about the men yet.’ ”

On the Astros switching hotels in Los Angeles: “I’m glad we’re getting out of the Biltmore. All they had in Pershing Square across the street were winos and ex-Pittsburgh Pirate draft choices.”

From Cleveland Manager Pat Corrales after Charlie Hudson of the New York Yankees beat the Indians, 11-3, Monday: “Why didn’t he do that for me four years ago?”

In 1983, Hudson was 8-8 for Philadelphia when Corrales got fired in midseason and was replaced by Paul Owens. In the World Series, Hudson lost two games as the Baltimore Orioles beat the Phillies in five games.

Said Roger Maltbie when asked his favorite drink: “Michelob when the sun is up and Scotch when the sun goes down.”

Maltbie, who wears a Michelob label on his hat, said he gets a free case every month.

“But I have to pick it up,” he said.

Trivia Time: What general manager of an NBA championship team beat the same club for the title 10 years later as the coach of another team? (Answer below.)

How fast is Bo Jackson? Kansas City center fielder Willie Wilson, explaining how he just missed catching the first hit off Bret Saberhagen Friday night, said: “I just wish I could run like Bo, maybe I would have got it.”

Wilson is second only to Rickey Henderson in career stolen bases in the American League. At one time, some were calling him the fastest man in baseball.

Now-it-can-be-told dept.: Magic Johnson told Jim Armstrong of the Denver Post: “I think I’ve put some of the fun back into the game for Kareem. He’s laughing and having fun since I’ve been here. Before I got here, they said he’s stern and doesn’t smile. ‘You’ve got to watch out for him,’ they told me. So when I came into my first training camp, I was kind of tip-toeing around because I didn’t want to get him mad.

“Then I said, ‘Well, I can’t not be myself any more.’ So I started acting wild and young and crazy. I hit him and patted him after he’d hit a sky hook, and he enjoyed it. He needed it. At that time, he didn’t have the enthusiasm he had when he first came in. I think I helped him smile more.”

Said Barbara Nicklaus when asked if there was anything her multi-talented husband couldn’t do: “Cup racks. We call him Handy Jack. The week we got back from our honeymoon, I asked him to put up a cup rack. Three screws. Two hours later, he was wringing wet in sweat. He’d used every cussword in the book. And the three screws still weren’t in.

“But, you know, maybe he’s smart. I never asked him to fix anything again. If I can’t fix it, I call the repairman.”

Trivia Answer: Jack Ramsay. He was the general manager of the 1966-67 Philadelphia 76ers and the coach of the 1976-77 Portland Trail Blazers.

Quotebook

Roger Brown, former Indiana Pacer star, on Pacer rookie Chuck Person: “He kind of reminds me of myself. He shoots a lot.”