Lighten Up a Little

You can visit eight people’s homes and see eight different versions of a decorated Christmas tree. While no single ornament may be the same among the eight trees, you can bet the lights will be either all white or colored, in small Italian or chunky American bulb sizes.

Some creative types are trying to change this. Stick your tracer lights on the back of your tree so you can string a “Mess-O-Trout” around the front. They’re 10 hang-dead trout that manage, nonetheless, to look like they were lifted off the pages of a children’s book.

The newest lights are strands of illuminated-from-within plastic objects, so you get both ornament and light in one piece. But with costs up to $23.50 a strand, you’re not getting two decorations for the price of one. You’re getting two for the price of two.

Still, how many people have a bunch of six-inch lizards crawling all over their tree?

“Anything that’s different is the going thing for the holidays,” says co-owner Laura Cowan of Light Bulbs Unlimited in Sherman Oaks. Rounding out the collection at her store are individual strands of plastic cows, ears of corn, radishes, carrots and seashells, all at $23.50 apiece. Less exotic are strands of hearts or chili peppers at $8.50 each.

“People buy them for gifts,” says co-owner Robin Cowan. “Or they’ll put the lizard lights up around the patio, or hang the vegetables in the kitchen. This is year-round, not just at Christmas.”

From an amortization point of view, this makes the lights a bargain.

Spring’s Hot Flash

Here’s an item that will either ruin or make your day: Hot pants (or short-shorts) for women are back in style this spring. Said one middle-aged clothing retailer whose Valley store may carry them: “I wore them 20 years ago when they were in fashion, but I’ll have to pass on them this time around.”

Judy’s, a Van Nuys-based chain of junior-sized women’s apparel, will be introducing hot pants in selected stores at the end of this month, according to Nancy Rosen, the firm’s woven-sportswear buyer.

“They’re mostly in denim or stretch twill. We’ll carry them initially in a small way to see customers’ reaction,” she says. “They’re all for casual wear, though.”

At Picanza Designer Clothing in Sherman Oaks, owner Farshad Rabbani will be introducing hot pants in rayon and cotton in both junior and women’s sizes. “They’re for dressy too. I think women might like them.”

Even if the women don’t, we know who will. “I wouldn’t mind seeing them,” said an enthusiastic Helmut Behensky, owner of Bea’s Swim and Sport, with several Valley outlets. “I love them.”

Are These Guys Cousins or What?

Today, a billboard will be erected at the corner of Ventura Boulevard and Woodley Avenue in Encino that might prompt passers-by to ask, “What is this, art?” And they’ll be right. It certainly won’t be an advertisement for fried chicken.

The Los Angeles-based outdoor advertising firm of Patrick Media Group joined forces with Los Angeles Contemporary Exhibitions to place three original artworks by Los Angeles artists on billboards around the city. Debuting in the Valley is a piece titled, “The Chairman and the Colonel.”

The hand-painted billboard is an enlargement of a multimedia artwork submitted by May Sun, 35, who lives in Hollywood Hills. The 14- by 48-foot board is visually split in half, with a ghostlike portrait of Mao Tse Tung on the left and the smaller corporate-logo face of Kentucky Fried Chicken’s Colonel Sanders on the right. Sanders is superimposed on top of a photo-realistic image of protesting students at Tien An Men Square in China. A red circle with a ban bar outlines the Colonel.

Artist Sun was born in China and lived there until she age 16. “A while ago I read that they opened a gigantic Kentucky’s in Tien An Men Square right across from Mao’s mausoleum. And I read that Chinese workers would sometimes save up to a week’s wages to eat there.

“I first got this concept back in May when the students were just starting to demonstrate, and I was going to call it “Democracy, It’s Finger-Lickin’ Good.” Then when the massacre happened, I thought that was too flippant. I added the ban sign because they did close down during the massacre. I guess I’m wondering ‘Is capitalism a necessary byproduct of democracy?’ ”

The billboard will stay up a month before being moved to another Los Angeles location. Within the next four months, the other two winning entries will be displayed in the Valley.

The Diet Dilemma

From soda pop to margarine, there’s scarcely a food product that isn’t repeated in a low-calorie or “lite” version of itself. Because of this, the diet section of the grocery store is going through somewhat of an identity crisis.

“There are so many low-cal or lite foods out now that they’re being integrated into the main sections of the store, not just stuck in the diet section,” says Steven Koff, president of the Southern California Grocers Assn.

While being low-calorie was the traditional claim to fame for diet foods, they’re apt to be touted today as being sodium, cholesterol or sugar-free. “If it’s no-salt or no-sugar added, it gets put in the diet section,” states Gary Tenant, manager of the newly remodeled Westward Ho in Sherman Oaks. The new diet section is slightly larger than the old one. All low-cal products are grouped within their regular product categories.

What’s diet food to some is health food to another. “We put all that no-salt, no-sugar food in our health-food section,” explains Doug Borkcert, manager of Dale’s Jr. in Tarzana.

“We got rid of the diet section a year ago, because a lot of that diet food wasn’t healthy. Why eat diet cookies with no sugar when it’s packed with salt? A rice cake is better for you,” he says. “People read the labels now and are more aware of what’s healthy and what’s not.”

Overheard

“Is it Christmas yet?”

--Weary shopper trudging through Fallbrook Mall in Canoga Park