Stars’ Efforts Mostly Lost on These Vehicles

THIS WEEK’S MOVIES

It’s a great week for a video study of big stars wasting their talent and our time in poor-value vehicles.

Robin Williams dependably puts the pedal to the metal in “Cadillac Man” (Orion, $94.98, R)--but somebody forgot to fuel up the script of this 1990 model. A black comedy about the calamities of a car salesman, “Cadillac Man” may be worth watching for the cast (with Tim Robbins, Pamela Reed and Fran Drescher along for the bumpy ride) and a few funny moments, but it misfires like mad.

“Bird on a Wire” (MCA/Universal, priced for rental, PG-13) doesn’t just sputter along, it breaks down entirely--even with the star power of Mel Gibson and Goldie Hawn. Despite desperate doses of outrageous humor (much of it involving damage to Gibson’s rear) and car-chase cliches, this couple-on-the-lam-from-bad-guys clunker goes nowhere worth going.

Two foreign stars fare little better in the French film “Camille Claudel” (Orion, $79.98, R), a 1988 drama about the steamy love affair between sculptor Auguste Rodin (Gerard Depardieu) and his female prodigy (Isabelle Adjani). The picture and Adjani won Oscar nominations, but this directorial debut by cinematographer Bruno Nuytten doesn’t develop the story’s possibilities very well.

Perhaps the weekend’s best bet is a film without stars--not typical movie stars, anyway: “Mystery Train” (Orion, $79.98, R). Directed by Jim Jarmusch (“Down by Law”) and featuring his usual offbeat characters and casting (including former Clash member Joe Strummer, Spike Lee’s brother Cinque and Screamin’ Jay Hawkins), this slow-moving but often delightful comedy-drama gets a lot of fun out of its seedy-side-of-Memphis setting.

Another quirky, worthwhile sleeper is “The Feud” (Vidmark, $89.95, R), a Romeo-and-Juliet-type tale set in ‘50s small-town America, based on a Thomas Berger novel, and with an able cast (Rene Auberjonois, Ron McLarty, Joe Grifasi) spiking its punch.

More new-to-tape movies: “Blind Fury” (RCA/Columbia, $89.95, R) has Rutger Hauer in a weird martial-arts thriller; “Eternity” (Academy, $89.95, R) stars Jon Voight and Armand Assante in a romantic drama about a muckraking TV reporter, a media mogul and a model.

OTHER NEW VIDEOS

The latest pop-music tapes from CMV are the first three volumes of “New Kids on the Block,” the ABC cartoon series all about those teen-age-girl favorites ($9.98 each), and “Living Colour: Time Tunnel,” a 60-minute documentary about the black rock group (not to be confused with Fox’s black comedy show “In Living Color”).