Looking Good on Vacation Proves Costly for Quarterback

Last Friday, the NCAA told Hofstra University of Hempstead, N.Y., that quarterback Rhory Moss would have to sit out the Flying Dutchmen’s Division III semifinal playoff game against Lycoming the next day.

A drug test administered after Hofstra’s victory over Trenton State in the quarterfinals a week earlier showed that Moss used anabolic steroids.

Said Moss: “I didn’t use the steroids for performance. I was going on spring break to the Bahamas last April and I wanted to put on a few pounds to look good.”

Athletic Director Jim Garvey said Hofstra filed an appeal Monday for two reasons:

“First, there is some doubt in my mind that the steroid usage would show up at this late date when it was last April that they were used.

“Secondly, the timing of informing us bothers me. The test was done almost a week previously, and I don’t know why it took so long to release the findings.”

Add Hofstra: Said Garvey: “In the best interests of all, the decision was made by the university to withhold him from the game.”

Ah, yes. How noble of the university to comply with a positive steroid test.

As for Garvey’s second reason, the one about timing:

Huh?

Add Hofstra: Said Moss: “Frankly, I was shocked when I was told that I had tested positive. I thought the steroids were completely out of my system. I lost the extra pounds that I had gained.”

Well, in that case, hey, that darned NCAA should have let him play, maybe even should have made him Almost-Drug-Free Athlete of the Week.

Trivia time: How many AFC head coaches did not play pro football?

Don’t cry for me: After his team was defeated in the Davis Cup finals by the United States, which strategically elected to play on a clay surface, Australian Captain Neale Fraser said:

“We love playing you Americans.

“We’ll play you on ice.

“We’ll play you on wood.

“We’ll play you on water.”

Trivia answer: Four: Buffalo’s Marv Levy, Indianapolis’ Ron Meyer, New England’s Rod Rust and Seattle’s Chuck Knox.

Quotebook: Toronto Globe and Mail columnist Stephen Brunt: “The SkyDome began with a couple of politicians getting wet at a Grey Cup game in Toronto, and $600 million later it’s still not time to close the books.”