Their Criticism of Tomczak, Schroeder Continues to Spiral

Mike Tomczak, the Green Bay Packer quarterback who used to play for the Chicago Bears, was sacked in Kevin Nelson’s latest book, “Football’s Greatest Insults.”

Randy Cross, the one-time San Francisco 49er center, offered this analysis: “A tough, hard-nosed player, by most standards. But unfortunately for Mike, quarterbacks don’t lead with their noses. He sometimes shows the field generalship of Pee-wee Herman.”

From Fred Smerlas, former nose tackle with the Buffalo Bills and the 49ers: “Tomczak looks like the Karate Kid. When he comes off the field after a bad pass, I keep expecting Mr. Miyagi to be on the sidelines.”

Add insults: The book quotes columnist Gary Peterson: “(Jay) Schroeder may be improved, but he’s still as dynamic as a parked car. . . . If the Raiders fall behind, you might want to send the children from the room. Schroeder could go hours without hitting a human being with a pass.”

Last add insults: Jim Brown on Bear Coach Mike Ditka: “(He) reminds me of many of the coaches back in the NFL of the 1950s: Fascist, loud . . . but not exactly Phi Beta Kappa.”

Trivia time: Which pro basketball team did George Mikan, the NBA star, originally sign with out of DePaul?

MIA: UC Irvine officials are perplexed about who stole the uniforms of the Anteater women’s basketball team, a squad that went 5-22 last season and 1-27 the year before.

But the real problem is replacing them. The season is fast approaching, and first-year Coach Colleen Matsuhara says uniform orders usually take six months. The school has placed a rush order--at a cost of about $4,000--and is hoping to have replacements in time.

Matsuhara would rather have the originals and cancel the order.

“No questions asked,” she offers.

Except this one from Times staff writer Robyn Norwood, who covers UC Irvine: “Why?”

Same old song and dance: When a power outage delayed the start of an NHL exhibition game this week between the Toronto Maple Leafs and the Quebec Nordiques at Kitchener, Canada, Maple Leaf forward Mike Foligno took the opportunity to make his singing debut.

Foligno grabbed a microphone during a delay before the game was canceled and serenaded the Ontario crowd of 6,000 with a partial rendition of “Amore” before the microphone lost power.

“These people paid good money to see me sing, then somebody pulled the plug on me,” Foligno said. “I only got in two verses.”

Two by four: This was a commuter’s dream match: The Boulder (Colo.) Bike Week included a race between county sheriff’s deputy George Epp on a bicycle and local newspaper publisher John Dotson in a car. The course across the small college town included stopping for coffee and paying a utility bill. VeloNews reported that Epp reached the finish line downtown five minutes ahead of Dotson.

Trivia answer: The Chicago Stags in 1946-47.

Quotebook: John McKay, former USC and Tampa Bay Buccaneer coach, on his profession: “You draw X’s and O’s on a blackboard and that’s not so difficult. I can even do it with my left hand.”