Name That Mutt

While your Buzz staff was out the other day, we met a nice little doggie who seemed perfectly normal--except for his name. His owner called him Alarm. When we inquired, she replied she couldn’t afford a security system for her home, so she got the dog instead and bestowed the title on him.

Then we encountered an itsy-bitsy Doberman attached to a Gucci-bagged young woman, who told us his name was Felony. We knew this weird name game had to be a trend when we met a yellow lab named Vanguard.

Does anybody remember when dogs had friendly names like Spot and Rover? At least this ominous fad hasn’t crossed over to babies.

Tender Bites

Your dedicated Buzz correspondents have spent quantity time researching the latest trends in hors d’oeuvres (hey--it’s a nasty job, but somebody has to do it.)

While in the party trenches, we recently noticed mini-lamb chops appearing on waiters’ trays. They showed up at a Music Center Opera Patrons party at the Dorothy Chandler Pavilion and at a book party at Neiman Marcus.

While most cocktail food is easy to handle, we find lamb chops arduous. For one thing, having to wrench the meat off the bone with your teeth can make you look like an angry carnivore. Then there’s the problem of what to do with the bone--too small for your dog, too big to try to bury in a planter.

Can finger foods of full-sized ribs and T-bone steaks be far behind?

Essentials

WHAT YOU NEED TO MANEUVER THE L.A. SCENE: With so many environmental fund-raisers crowding the social scene, how you arrive at these events is as important as the size of your donation. After all, you don’t want to be caught by the paparazzi in one of those “let ‘em eat cake” poses.

Petrol-sucking stretch limos are definitely out; car pooling in fuel-efficient cars is the way to go, unless you want to go the Ed Begley Jr. route and take the bus or drive an electric car. (Of course, hiring a limo is OK if you cram at least 10 of your close, personal friends in with you).