Ins and Outs of This Sport Are Just That

The most recent issue of SportsLetter, a publication of the Amateur Athletic Foundation of Los Angeles, includes an item that is supposed to have come from England and is called “Cricket: As explained to a foreign visitor.” It reads:

“You have two sides, one out in the field and one in. Each man that’s on the side that’s in, goes out, and when he’s out, he comes in, and the next man goes in until he’s out.

“When they are all out, the side that’s out comes in, and the side that’s been in goes out and tries to get those coming in, out.

“Sometimes you get men still in and not out. When both sides have been in and out, including the not outs, that’s the end of the game.”

Now, any questions? Maybe only one: Who wrote this, Abbott or Costello?

Trivia time: What do NBA centers Hakeem Olajuwon, Dikembe Mutombo, Luc Longley, Patrick Ewing, Rony Seikaly, Vlade Divac and Rik Smits have in common?

Call Ad Age: The current slogan for aspiring U.S. Olympic athletes? “No Pain, No Spain.”

Yeah, sure: “For us to think we’re going to have an easy day on Saturday would be a misconception,” said Notre Dame Coach Lou Holtz, whose No. 5-ranked Irish (7-1) play Navy (0-7). The Middies haven’t beaten Notre Dame since 1963.

More Irish: In Navy’s 35-14 victory over Notre Dame 28 years ago, Navy’s junior quarterback, Roger Staubach, completed nine of 15 passes for 91 yards and two touchdowns and rushed for 23 yards in 19 carries. Staubach won the Heisman Trophy that year.

Feliz cumpleanos: Fernando Valenzuela is 31 today.

History lesson: Forty-one years ago today, Charles Cooper of Duquesne, the first black player drafted by an NBA team, made his debut with the Boston Celtics.

Huh?The Chicago Tribune reported this comment by Wisconsin basketball Coach Steve Yoder: “Raycom told me in 1990 there were 12,000 TV sets in Madison watching basketball. Last year in 1991, there were 36,000. That’s an increase of 150%.” Retorted the newspaper’s Mike Conklin: “New math.”

Rockies and ball wrinkles: The National League released findings from a study on how a baseball will be affected by the altitude in mile-high Denver. Among the conclusions, for what they’re worth:

--A batted ball will travel 9% farther than at sea level.

--A curveball that breaks 14 inches at sea level will break 11 inches in Denver.

--Hitters will have .003 of a second less to hit a 100-m.p.h. fastball.

--Outfielders will be able to throw the ball 9% farther.

Presumably, the seventh-inning stretch will be unaffected.

Drive time: Five of the Raiders’ last seven opponents--Buffalo, New Orleans, Denver, Kansas City and Seattle--have a combined record of 31-11.

Trivia answer: None was born in the United States.

Quotebook: Notre Dame sophomore fullback Jerome Bettis, who ran for 178 yards and scored two touchdowns against USC last Saturday but also fumbled for the first time in 119 carries: “I guess I just have to come back and regroup.”