ANAHEIM : Home Away From Home for Disabled

When parents need a getaway weekend, they mostly call the grandparents or the teen-ager down the street until they eventually find a baby-sitter for their child.

But if the child is severely mentally disabled, Orange County couples often have only one place to turn--Columbian House.

Operated by Orange County Catholic Charities and the only home of its kind in the county, its goal is to give a brief respite to families who need a break from caring for a mentally disabled child. Many use the opportunity to go places they could not visit with their child.

“Imagine what it’s like to have to take care of somebody every day who has the mental capacity of a 1- or 2-year-old and know that it is never going to change,” David Amestoy said.

A Fullerton architect, Amestoy and his wife, Ellen, brought their 13-year-old son, Michael, to the home last weekend so they could visit Las Vegas. “We just need a couple days away, and then we can go back to being a family again.”

“This is a wonderful place,” Ellen Amestoy said.

Sister Kristan Schlichte, the executive director of Orange County Catholic Charities and the founder of the 11-year-old home, said: “If it wasn’t for Columbian House, I think a lot of these children would be placed permanently outside of the home.”

Located at the end of an Anaheim Hills cul-de-sac, the house has a staff of three and cares for children from newborn to 17 years old. Fees are paid by the state or the parents, depending on their financial status, and the home is open to Catholics and non-Catholics alike. It is open daily from June through September and Friday through Sunday the rest of the year. Reservations are made weeks, even months, in advance, Schlichte said.

There is no sign or anything else to differentiate the well-kept, converted residence that Columbian House occupies from its neighbors. That is by design, Schlichte said.

“If it was your child, wouldn’t you want the place where you are dropping him or her off to look like a home and not an institution?” she asked rhetorically.

Inside, there are three bedrooms for the six children the home can accept. Each has two twin beds on which rails can be installed if necessary to keep a child from falling off or wandering. The bathrooms have been converted so they can accommodate wheelchairs because many of the mentally disabled also have physical limitations.

In the back yard are a grassy area, a swing set on which the children can play and a hot tub, which is covered when not in use.

One recent Friday afternoon, the living room was abuzz as parents began arriving with their children for weekend stays, while others were there to pick up children who had been left for the week.

Donald Rivers, his wife, Susan, and their 9-year-old daughter, Stephanie, had arrived to pick up Allison, who is 7 and has cerebral palsy and autism. The Lakewood family had spent five days in a Buena Park hotel, visiting Knott’s Berry Farm and just relaxing. They have been bringing Allison to Columbian House periodically for two years.

“Allison can have seizures at any time of the day or night, so it wouldn’t be fair to leave her with somebody who doesn’t have adequate training,” Susan Rivers said. She and the other members of the family say that they love Allison and don’t want to sound cruel but that sometimes she can place so much strain on each of them that they need a vacation from her.

“She has no concept of (right or wrong), so you have to watch her all of the time,” said Donald Rivers, a lighting contractor. “Sometimes we’ll just find her sitting on the lawn eating flowers. If she was on a roof, she would walk off the edge. She is in her own little world.”

Susan Rivers, who stays home with Allison, said: “Columbian House lets us relieve the pressure cooker. After five days we come back with a different outlook.”