Couple Making Most of Their Timeouts

Carol Murphy sits in the stands, tapping the toes of her cowboy boots against the bleacher seat below. The boots, a dressy two-toned pair in brown and black, are quite a fashion statement for a woman who prefers sweats to silk. But fashion isn’t the motivation. Not on game night, anyway.

“My lucky boots,” Carol says. “Mike hasn’t lost a game since I started wearing them.”

As if on cue, Mike Murphy glances up from the basketball court below and smiles at his wife. A moment before, while watching his Sonora boys’ basketball team warm up, his expression was grim. Now, he and his wife are exchanging goo-goo eyes.

If this sounds like a Michael Bolton moment, it’s not. Mike and Carol Murphy are not that sappy. But when you have as little time together as they do, you tend to make the most of not only every hour, but every passing glance.

Mike, 36, coaches and teaches at Sonora. Carol, 28, coaches the girls’ junior varsity at Corona del Mar and works a day-time office job in Tustin. If they’re lucky, they see each other on Sundays.

A strain? You bet. Most marriages have a tough enough time when one spouse coaches, such are the demands of the profession. But even with twice as many games, practices and booster club meetings, this two-coach couple is perfectly content. At least in Mike’s mind.

“I always tell Carol it’s a match made in heaven,” he says with a laugh. “But she doesn’t go for that.”

Truth be told, Carol doesn’t go for a lot of things Mike says or does. These two are as different as two people in love can be. We’ll start with the basics:

Mike is an optimist; Carol is not. Last summer, when his family’s speedboat sank after a storm, Mike swam out to save it. Carol pronounced it a total loss. (She was right).

Mike is cautious with money; Carol is not so cautious (hence those stylish two-toned boots). When the couple was looking for a new house last summer, they nearly drove each other crazy. “Mike wants the unbelievable deal. I just want to get a place,” Carol says. They never reached an agreement, thus their current address--a Huntington Beach apartment.

Mike likes his food bland; Carol grew up in an Italian household where garlic was the spice of life. The first time Mike cooked for Carol, he made his specialty--boiled chicken breast and plain, boiled noodles. No seasoning, no sauce, no nothing. Carol left his apartment--and came back with a jar of Prego.

“He thinks all spices are bad for you,” Carol says. “I say, ‘What do you want? Everything to taste like paper?’ ”

Mike likes the soft sounds of James Taylor and Jeffrey Osborne. Carol likes everything from country to KROQ to Frank Sinatra.

“I always tell him he’s musically narrow-minded,” she says.

Then there’s the difference in temperament. Put it this way, if a major disaster strikes and you have to be around one or the other, choose Mike without hesitation. Stress is in no way Carol’s best friend.

“Put it this way,” Mike says. “I cannot believe she’s never gotten a technical foul. When she coaches, she’s all over the court.”

Carol: “I can be a little intense.”

A little?

When Mike couldn’t remember where he parked the car after a movie one night last week, Carol started screaming. When Mike couldn’t get a hit during a co-ed softball game, Carol started yelling. When Mike, playing shortstop, threw the ball into the dirt instead of at Carol at first base, Carol threw a fit. When Mike had trouble changing a flat tire, Carol screamed, “Give me the tools!”

“That’s the great thing about Carol,” Mike says. “She speaks her mind.”

With the Murphys, love isn’t blind. It’s deaf.

“He is incredibly patient,” Carol admits.

“She yells and I just laugh,” Mike says. “It drives her nuts.”

“I could kill him,” she says.

Ah, romance.

Despite their occasional bickering--most of which is all in good fun--the Murphys are among the cutest couples on Earth. They met at a Halloween dance. Carol was dressed as a French whore; Mike came as his usual preppy-dressed self. When Mike’s friends ditched him, Carol was more than happy to offer him a ride to his house. A few weeks later, she stopped by to see him. He and a friend were playing baseball against the garage door of his apartment. Carol grabbed the bat and hit a home run. For Mike, it was love at first swing.

They’ll be married two years this June. The hardest part, Carol says, has been dealing with Mike’s year-round dedication to basketball. Along with coaching, he works as a recreational league referee during the off-season, and plays in a rec league as well. As for Carol, this was her first year as coach. Her team finished the season last week at 19-8 overall. The Sea Kings won their last 10 games, Carol says, because of Mike’s advice to go with a full-court press.

Carol offers Mike advice, too, though not always at the perfect moment.

“She got real mad after a game once,” says Mike, whose team enters the Southern Section playoffs next week at 22-3.

“She said, ‘Mike! You never look up in the stands so I can tell you what to do!’ I said, “Carol, I have two assistants here. . .’ ”

But it’s Carol who has the boots.

Barbie Ludovise’s column appears Wednesday, Friday and Sunday. Readers may reach Ludovise by writing her at The Times Orange County Edition, 1375 Sunflower Ave., Costa Mesa, 92626 or by calling (714) 966-5847.