CAL STATE NORTHRIDGE: SEASON IN REVIEW : An Appropriate End to a Strange Season : College baseball: Matadors try not to let torturous loss in regionals obscure their achievements amid difficult circumstances.

As Cal State Northridge pitcher Evan Howland walked six St. John’s players, all Northridge right fielder Greg Shepard could do was watch his college baseball career come to a slow, torturous end.

“There was such a feeling of helplessness,” Shepard said. “You really couldn’t do anything. It just leaves you with a big hole in your gut.”

As Shepard stood by, Howland, a freshman from El Camino Real High, walked in the tying and winning runs in the ninth inning. Ahead by seven runs in the fifth inning, the Matadors squandered the lead and lost, 11-10. The loss knocked them out of the NCAA West Regional and ended their season at 36-20.

Although Shepard could not express his disappointment in a postgame interview, he said two days later that he felt more fulfilled than he did in 1992 when the Matadors were eliminated from the Midwest Regional in three games.

“I don’t feel as bad because I can’t blame it on my teammates or myself,” said Shepard, who shared the team opinion that the home plate umpire squeezed the strike zone on Howland and starter Johnny Najar.

“The game should never be decided by an umpire. The game is for the players and that’s the way it should always be decided.”

Najar, a junior from San Fernando High who was making his first start since May 8 and only his fifth of the season, was heartsick about his performance. His inability to finish the game caused the Matadors to use Howland for the second time that day. Howland had pitched five innings in a 9-0 loss to Arizona State.

“I think about it all the time,” Najar said. “If I could have gone a little longer, things might have been different.”

Najar believed the umpire called a tight strike zone the entire game, but particularly in the eighth inning. Compounding the situation, Najar was tiring.

Afterward in the team hotel, Najar said, he and his teammates walked around in a daze.

“Everyone was in shock,” he said. “Suddenly, it was all over.”

Pitcher Marco Contreras called the disastrous ninth inning a fitting denouement to a strange season.

First, Pierce College transfer Eric Raba was lost for the season because of academic ineligibility, reducing the pitching staff to eight. Then Steven Morales, the projected ace of the staff, suffered an arm injury that limited him to two appearances.

Initially, the loss of Raba and Morales did not slow the Matadors. They started 9-0 and soared to a No. 13 ranking in the national polls, surprising Coach Bill Kernen, who thought the team lacked the talent of his 1991 and ’92 teams.

Then midway through the season, assistant Stan Sanchez resigned and the team went into a tailspin. The loss of Sanchez reduced the already shorthanded staff to Kernen and volunteer P.C. Shaw.

After losing seven of the next 11 games, the Matadors regrouped to win five straight, but then lost four in a row to jeopardize their chances for an NCAA postseason berth.

But just as they were counted out, they won eight of their last 11 and were seeded No. 2 in the West Regional in Tempe, Ariz.

They promptly won their first two games in the regional and appeared on course for a College World Series berth. But No. 1-ranked Arizona State dulled those hopes, pounding John Bushart and Howland and limiting the Matadors to four hits.

In the final game, they hit St. John’s hard, but the 10 walks in the last two innings cost them their 10-5 lead. While Howland was walking batters, all three pitchers expected to throw the following day (Morales, Keven Kempton and Contreras) volunteered for relief.

But Kernen would not allow them to warm up. He said that no pitcher could get the umpire to call a strike at that point.

The disaster against St. John’s capped the most unusual season of Kernen’s 15 in coaching.

“Every day you thought you had seen it all and then something else would happen,” Kernen said.

Although Kernen could speak of little else, he tried to get his players to forget about the umpiring in the final game.

In their last team meeting Tuesday, he told them that their regional berth was a significant accomplishment for “a marginally talented group without (a full coaching staff).”

“They ran some practices by themselves and got through that rough period in April to finish well,” he said. “And the first two days of the regional they played great.”

Depending on the draft, the pitching staff might have to be rebuilt. Kernen could lose one, two, or all three of his best pitchers (Contreras, Kempton and Bushart). Bushart was drafted in the 24th round by the Angels and will decide soon whether to sign or return to school.

Shepard, left fielder David Prosenko, second baseman Chris Olsen, shortstop Andy Hodgins, third baseman Andy Small and catcher Mike Sims also must be replaced.

Designated hitter Keyaan Cook is expected to take over at second base next season and reserve Tyler Nelson is slotted for third base. Kernen has prescribed a rigorous off-season weight training program for Nelson in the hopes that he can replace at least half of Small’s 20 home runs.

Given its scholarship budgetary limitations, the team always will lack pitching depth, according to Kernen. “We’ve been thin every year,” he said.

After signing a pitcher and five recruits to fill the gaps in the infield and outfield, Kernen is $30,000 under the NCAA limit for scholarships. But he cannot sign three coveted high school pitchers because he is out of the scholarship allotment provided him by the university’s athletic program.

“It’s too bad,” Kernen said. “There are a few kids who really, really wanted to come here.”

Without them, the Matadors could run out of postseason pitching and know that helpless feeling again.