COMEDY

Whoops: Actor Ted Danson wore blackface and had a waiter bring out watermelon when he said he was thirsty Friday in a no-holds-barred “roast” of comedian Whoopi Goldberg at the New York Friars Club. The star-filled tribute featured largely tasteless humor that is the tradition of the annual roasts. Stars included Robin Williams, Robert DeNiro, Michael Douglas and boxer Sugar Ray Leonard. Danson, who has been romantically linked to Goldberg, stunned the crowd by coming out in blackface and made a series of offensive jokes not likely to be seen on any television show. The actress took the whole affair in good spirits, laughing heartily at the barbs and the blackface.

TELEVISION

CBS Comings & Goings: Two new CBS comedies, “It Had to Be You” and “Family Album,” will be taken off the schedule after next Friday. CBS officials insisted that the two series, which have received poor ratings since their debut, are still in production and will return later in the season on another night. The shows, which air from 8 to 9 p.m. will be replaced Oct. 29 with a Dick Van Dyke mystery series, “Diagnosis Murder.” Also, “Hearts Afire” starring John Ritter and Markie Post, will premiere its second season Oct. 27 at 8 p.m., while “The Nanny,” a new comedy starring Fran Drescher, premieres Nov. 3 at 8:30 p.m.

*

Pick-Up Team: ABC’s controversial police drama, “NYPD Blue,” and “Phenom,” the new fall comedy about a teen tennis champion, have been picked up for the remainder of the season, officials announced.

*

‘Seinfeld’ Alert: Fans of “Seinfeld” may want to catch “Seinfeld and Friends” tonight at 5 p.m. on E! Entertainment Television. It’s billed as a behind-the-scenes look at the show that will, among other things, answer the burning question of whether or not the mango is really Jerry’s favorite fruit.

*

‘Beavis and Butt-head’ Slammed Again: Officials in Ohio blamed MTV’s “Beavis and Butt-head” for inspiring a 5-year-old boy to play with fire, eventually causing the blaze that killed his 2-year-old sister Wednesday, the second fire in that state that officials blame on the show. Harold Sigler, fire chief for the town of Moraine, told the Associated Press that the boy’s mother said the child had been fascinated with fire ever since he saw an episode of the show. AP’s calls to MTV on Friday were not returned.

*

Guest Spots Galore: Eddie Albert and Jerry Stiller each do a guest stint on ABC soap operas, Albert on “General Hospital” on Friday and Stiller on “All My Children” on Oct. 18. Angie Dickinson guest stars on Fox’s “Daddy Dearest” Sunday. And real-life sisters Jayne and Audrey Meadows play siblings on, yes, NBC’s “Sisters” on Oct. 16. “Love, Alice,” Audrey Meadows’ memoirs of her time on “The Honeymooners” with the late Jackie Gleason, will be published next fall.

*

Stern’s ‘Parts’ Sell Out: You can’t see Howard Stern’s private parts on the cover of his new book, and now you may have some trouble finding “Private Parts” in bookstores, too. Publishers Simon & Schuster announced a reprint of 500,000, which they say is the biggest in the company’s 70-year history, following reports from around the country that several stores sold out of the book on its first day of release. Andrew Giangola of Paramount Publishing said that first-day sale estimates for the book are between 50,000 and 75,000. New York fans came out for hometown boy Stern: Giangola said he had reports that fans at one Barnes & Noble store lined up outside while store employees ripped open cartons of books and sold them straight from the boxes.

*

No Kidding: On Nickelodeon Oct. 18, Linda Ellerbee will moderate a Nick News special, “Are You What You Watch?,” which will allow kids to question Howard Stringer, president of CBS Broadcast Group, about children’s TV and violence on TV.

QUICK TAKES

Jillian Warry joins KTTV/Fox 11 News at 10 as weekend weathercaster next week. Warry comes from WSVN, the Fox station in Miami. . . . The Old Globe Theatre’s current San Diego production of “Damn Yankees” has received the green light to go to Broadway from the show’s original creators, and producers say they’ve already raised enough money for the move. . . . Marilu Henner of TV’s “Evening Shade” and husband Robert Lieberman are expecting their first child in the spring. . . . Van Halen fans can see Sammy Hagar and Michael Anthony perform free--if they’re willing to fly to Mexico, that is. Hagar and Anthony will play three free nights starting Wednesday at the band’s Cabo Wabo Cantina in Cabo San Lucas, with a fourth night Oct. 17 set for charities in the region. . . . A photograph of artist Georgia O’Keeffe taken by her husband, Alfred Stieglitz, brought a record price at auction Friday: $398,500. The Stieglitz photo handily broke last year’s record of $193,895 for Man Ray’s “Glass Tears.” . . . You can take a chance buying tickets for “Guys and Dolls” Monday morning at the Pantages Theatre: Either stand in the “Saints” line and buy your tickets in the regular way, or you can line up with the “Sinners” and take your chances at the craps table. An 11 or a 7 will win you a 10% discount on tickets for the popular musical.