A Few Good Reasons to Pick High School Football Over ‘Mandy’

So the Southern Section football championships are this weekend, yet you, skeptical sports fan, couldn’t care less. You don’t understand why people would crowd into a football stadium when they could stay home and watch “Hellraiser III” (tonight on cable) or a 90-minute Ode to Barry Manilow (Saturday on PBS). You honestly wonder whether anyone recognizes quality entertainment anymore.

Well, for those few who are still undecided, we present our primer on the more interesting aspects of the Southern Section football championships. In other words, A Few Good Reasons to Shun Barry Manilow This Weekend (if not forever):

Payback

As in Rialto Eisenhower-Mater Dei. Two years ago, Mater Dei upset Eisenhower, then the nation’s top-ranked team, in the Division I title game. Eisenhower Coach Tom Hoak, apparently reeling from the “I’m clueless” vibes common to Anaheim Stadium, instructed his run-oriented team to pass as never before. This strategy cost Eisenhower the game. And don’t think Glenn Thompkins will forget it.

Thompkins is Eisenhower’s quarterback. In the ’91 final, he replaced starter Jevon Hicks in the second half, ran 76 yards for a touchdown, then watched his team’s chances slowly disintegrate. Tonight, Thompkins is aiming for a far better ending. Count on it.

‘50s-style football

Yes, bring out those bobby socks. Put on your coonskin caps. At least if you’re cheering for Costa Mesa. The Mustangs, who play Trabuco Hills Saturday, thrive in the style (run, run, run some more) that was hip back in the malt-shop days. Let’s not forget, retro is in. If you want to be fashionable, you must attend.

Jinx Busters

That’s the code phrase for Trabuco Hills these days. Seems the Mustangs were feeling a bit hexed for awhile during the season, then Coach Jim Barnett figured it out. His team’s three losses came on specific occasions--on a Saturday, on the road and during a full moon. Barnett is confident the bad luck is behind them.

“We beat Laguna Beach on the road, we beat Bellflower under a full moon and we beat Laguna Hills on a Saturday,” Barnett said. “So we’re going into this game having conquered our three jinxes.”

Of course, conquering Costa Mesa will be another matter entirely.

Bickering

That’s right, bickering. As in coaches mouthing off to each other because they can’t agree on which play to call, especially in tense situations. If history repeats itself, you’ll see it on the Whittier High sideline. Coaches yelling at each other, throwing headsets, making their players look like the mature ones. If you’re into human relations, this will make for a fascinating study.

Of course, if it gets to be too much, you can just switch sides. Whittier plays Savanna Saturday night. That’s Savanna, as in the always-calm Coach Fred DiPalma and his ever-disciplined players. If poise and control have anything to do with it, Savanna wins this one, easy.

Hair-raising success

For this, we turn to the offensive linemen at Brethren Christian, which plays L.A. Baptist tonight. “The Mighty Five,” as these linemen like to call themselves, decided this season to shave their heads. Nothing original, except they opted to save the hair for good luck. They store the clippings in a big trash bag, placed in a big box.

Every week, Brethren Christian Coach Ken Sharrar comes up with an inspirational word or phrase and the linemen adorn the box with it. The process is supposed to remind them of the importance of commitment.

Question: If Brethren wins tonight, does Sharrar get doused by the standard bucket of ice water or a big box of hair?

The Game

You guessed it. Los Alamitos versus Huntington Beach. The county’s No. 1 against No. 2, Saturday night at Cerritos College. If this one doesn’t interest you, you must be nearly comatose. Get an EKG, quick.

Los Alamitos, as you might already know, has the finest offense in Orange County (sorry Rams), a brutally tough defense and a 34-game unbeaten streak. Huntington Beach has a bunch of players who would like to prove they are more than Team Tony Gonzalez. Los Alamitos has a head coach (John Barnes) who wears the same lucky blue underwear on game nights. Huntington has parents and boosters so enthused, they’ll no doubt have a parade if their team pulls it off.

How will it turn out? Go and see for yourself. It’s time you recognized some quality entertainment.